Chuck Versus the Book
by abberz9
Summary: Chuck just told Sarah all about their wonderful life they spent together. However, Sarah doesn't remember. But after he told her their story, Sarah fell in love with Chuck all over again. She asked Chuck to kiss her and the rest has remained a mystery. Find out the journey that lies ahead of these two.
1. Chapter 1

Chuck held Sarah in his arms as they slowly finished a kiss. Chuck then looked into Sarah's bright blue eyes that he adored. However, by the look on her face he was sure the kiss hadn't worked. They both stayed silent for several minutes just looking at the ocean waves that rolled towards the shore then back out to sea. The two of them sat there alone with their thoughts before Chuck broke the ice.

"Umm, we better head out, it's getting dark and the tide is going to come in soon." Chuck stated in a soft tone just looking at his shoes. "Oh, uh, yeah." Sarah replied just looking at her hands avoiding eye contact

"Do, uh, you need a ride to your apartment- um, your... home?" Chuck asked as he finally realized that Sarah wouldn't be sleeping next to him anymore. His wife, the love of his life was no longer there at night. It was then he wished he had fully enjoyed the moments when she would wake him up at night while tossing and turning, or getting up from the bed. He wished he had cherished all the moments they had breakfast together or even brushed their teeth. Because he now realized that it was all over.

"Uh, no. I uh, have my own car, but thank you anyways." Sarah said as a tear slowly fell from her left eye. It was then she realized everything that had been taken away from her. She couldn't remember the wonderful life she had with a man she hardly knew and couldn't understand what kind of cruel person would ruin and destroy their lives for someone else's. Chuck nodded his head as they trudged up the sand together in silence. Chuck didn't know what to say. He didn't want to ask her questions about her life. He didn't want her to feel uncomfortable or insecure, or guilty. He could tell that she believed this was her fault she couldn't remember. Her fault she couldn't understand anything now. But Chuck didn't even want to bring it up. Sarah didn't want to talk either. She was searching her mind for anything important that she could remember, only to find it blank. It was just a maze of memories and every time she thought she was close to remembering, she just hit a dead end.

"Well here we are." Chuck said as he unlocked his car. He did however notice that Sarah didn't unlock hers. She just stood there with hand on the roof of her car and her eyes staring into the window.

"Did you lock your keys in, cause I can g-" Chuck started to talk before Sarah interrupted

"Chuck. I do- "I know you don't remember it's okay, it was a stupid idea that Morgan had." Chuck interrupted

"No, Chuck, that's just the thing. I do." Sarah replied Chuck's eyes widened as his mouth slowly dropped open.

"No, not like that. I don't remember hardly anything just small tidbits of information. I sort of remember the first time I met you. There was a black phone and a little girl in a tutu. I remember some parts of the Wienerlicious restaurant like you witnessed before. I remember the yogurt restaurant uniform as well. I remember some parts of helping you find your father and parts of you saving me from that Shaw dude. I hardly remember you proposing to me and I hardly remember our wedding. But that is about it. I don't know maybe it's just because you made me think long and hard about it and you told me our story bit by bit, but I don't know." Sarah said

"Hey that's a start and I could help you remember more, but you probably don't want to huh?" Chuck said

"Well... I'm willing to try." Sarah stated letting out a big breath of air. That was all Chuck needed to hear. She may not remember everything, but at least she was willing to try.


	2. Chapter 2

"Devon! Did you find Clara's blanket!?" Ellie yelled from the top of the stairs

"No! It's nowhere to be found!" Devon replied

"The moving truck is going to be here in five minutes, and if you can't find Clara's blanket I will make you walk to Chicago!" Ellie yelled Devon continued sifting through each in every box searching for the blanket. Clara was screaming in the background while Ellie was trying to calm the poor thing down.

"Devon the moving truck is h-

"Found it!" Devon yelled

"Yes!" Ellie stated as she caught the blanket that Devon tossed her direction.

"Now quickly re-tape all those boxes, and I'll go put Clara in the car."

"Babe, don't forget her teething ring in the freezer. It's all nice and cold." Devon said as he pointed at the freezer. Ellie rushed over and took the teething ring out of the fridge and held it near Clara's gums.

"That better." Ellie looked at Clara's red cheeks and puffy eyes

"Okay where do you want us to start?" One of the moving guys said as he walked through the already open door. He was a heavier man and had a black mustache. His feet were rather large and his eyes weren't much different. He stood with back slouched and his chin drooped down to the floor.

"Why don't you start with the couches and chairs and then move on to kitchen supplies. All these boxes over here labeled clothes go in last." Devon said

"Okay" replied the moving guy

"Hey, anything you need me to do?" Chuck asked as he entered the house

"Yah, hold Clara while we get everything in." Ellie said Chuck took Clara in his arms while holding the teething ring in her mouth.

"Five years in the spy business building up my muscle and this is what I have to show for it. Holding a seventeen pound baby. Pathetic." Chuck told Clara while she looked at him.

"Devon baby can you hand me the diaper bag?" Ellie asked

"Actually I think baby Clara needs the diaper bag now." Chuck said while pointing to Clara's bottom. "It's by the door, just change her." Ellie said.

"What?" Chuck replied sounding confused.

"You take the old diaper off and put a new one on. How hard can it be." Ellie stated.

"Umm...okay." Chuck replied sounding hesitant He put the changing pad on the counter and took the old diaper off and replacing it with a new.

"Ta da!" Chuck yelled as he held up the baby. "I should get an award!"

"Hey Mr. Reward man, help us load this refrigerator into the truck will ya!" one of the moving guys demanded sounding quite annoyed

"Uh... Sure." Chuck replied wondering if the guy had noticed he was holding a baby. Chuck just placed Clara in a baby bouncer sitting by the kitchen counter and walked outside. He helped the movers move Ellie and Awesome's black leather couch into the moving truck along with some kind of wood cabinet. They then loaded the bed and the crib which had both been taken apart. Finally after an hour of moving things into the car, the moving guy with a big long beard closed the door and sealed it shut. Ellie and Devon gave Chuck their final hugs for a while and hopped into the car. Chuck, who still had Clara in his arms, said goodbye to his niece and attempted to put her in her car seat.

"I've got it." Ellie said as she hopped out if the passengers seat of their gray sienna. She buckled Clara in and gave Chuck one last hug before she hopped back in.

"Aces Charles, your aces. Don't forget that." Ellie then buckled her seat belt and shut the car door. Then they drove off.


	3. Chapter 3

"Well what about that chair?" Alex asked

"No that's just horrendous!" Morgan stated sounding disgusted. "Well, we have gone through about 40 different kinds of chairs and you have found at least one bad thing about each. This green chair you said looks like snot. This small brown chair you said looked like a burnt wookie, and this pretty blue one reminded you of a chair you saw on a cartoon once. Pick a dang chair Morgan!"

"No! They all look hideous!" Morgan stated

"Okay, what about this red one?" Alex asked with a rather annoyed look on her face

"But-"

"We are getting it Morgan, no exceptions!" Alex yelled

"Fine!" Morgan said as he folded his arms and shook his hips. "Okay, now onto bed covers, I am sick of sleeping under a Star Wars blanket every night." Alex said.

"House shopping huh?" Lester said as he pulled around the corner his arm drooping over Alex's shoulder.

"I thought you guys were in Germany or something?" Morgan asked shoving Lester's arm off of his girlfriend's shoulder.

"We were, but Jeff and I here had a week off and we flew back to Burbank to visit the old dump." Lester said in his creepy voice.

"You mean the Buy-More." Morgan said.

"You see me and Jeff here have seen many Buy-Mores now and compared to the one in Germany, this place is garbage, we're glad we don't work here anymore!" Lester yelled

"You do realize we are in the Large Mart right now, and if you excuse us we have more house shopping to do!" Morgan said tugging Alex toward him.

"Oh you two are moving in together are ya, got room in the bed for three?" Jeff said walking toward Alex. Morgan pushed him out of the way and brushed alex behind so that Jeff could not do anything 'Jeff like.'

"Come on, Alex!" Morgan said as he grabbed her hand and pulled her over to the bedding isle

"How about this one?" Morgan asked pointing to a quilt on the bottom shelf.

"Ew! That reminds me of a hideous quilt that is in Pride and Prejudice!" Alex wrinkled her nose. She was so cute when she did that, thought Morgan.

"Oh, and I'm picky!" Morgan said sarcastically.

After hours of shopping Morgan and Alex finally bought their stuff and drove home. When they arrived at their house in Echo Park they started setting everything up in their bedroom.

"What are you doing?" Alex said looking at Morgan setting action figures on a shelf. "Putting up my collectibles. See this is Chewbacca here in the middle and this is Darth Vader and here is-"

"I get it. Just put them on that shelf instead please." Alex replied

"Fine..." Morgan said in a saddened tone Alex then placed a nice picture of some flowers on the shelf Morgan wanted to put the action figures on.

"Way better." Alex stated.


	4. Chapter 4

Chuck and Sarah were down in castle reviewing everything Sarah could remember. From different movies to decorations in their house.

"Okay, well that's a start." Chuck stated as Sarah finished the list she had written of everything she could remember.

"Well, what do I do now?" Sarah asked

"Well, things that can help you remember can vary. It depends on the person. Ellie has been working on creating a video of us. Pictures, videos Jeff and Lester had, anything that was a drastic change in anything, and is clashing it all together. That should be ready in a week or so, but until-"

"Chuck, just showing me pictures isn't going to help." Sarah said, "I have seen dozens of pictures around your house of our wedding, to engagement photos, to just random things. I don't remember it. I have gone through computer files looking through things and it is all just random things!"

"That's why I went searching." I went on Amazon and found glasses similar to intersect glasses. You can upload a good amount of data and it can be imported into the brain. At least that's what Ellie said." Chuck finished

"Okay. What do we do until then?" Sarah asked "We keep working on restoring your memories." Chuck replied

"Let's start with music. I will play a song and you tell me where you have heard it before. Got it."

"Yah, I think so." Sarah said Chuck inserted a cd into the cd player and turned on song number one.

"Have you heard this before?" Chuck asked with hope in his eyes

"Uh, I don't think so." Sarah replied Chuck turned on song number two.

"This"

"Sorry, no." Chuck kept turning on songs until he got to song number seven.

"Anything Sarah?"

Sarah thought hard as she listened to the song.

"What is it called?" Sarah asked

"First day of my life, by Bright Eyes." Chuck replied with a small ounce of hope in his eyes

"Wasn't this played during our wedding video?" Sarah said Chuck's eyes opened as his hands covered his mouth. He nodded in reply and just stared at Sarah, wondering how she got it right.

"I was right. I remembered!" Sarah said enthusiastically as a tear rolled from her right eye. "Go to the next one."

Chuck turned to the next one as the whole song played.

"I don't know." Sarah said with a saddened look in her eyes Chuck played 9 more songs before finishing the disk. Sarah didn't remember anymore songs. Chuck just looked at her as she looked at the cd player.

"What do you remember about the wedding video." Chuck asked

"I remember Jeff put it together, and that Ellie was surprised enough to kiss him. I remember something about a phone call and a hospital room, but that is it." Sarah replied

"That's really good-" Sarah ran to Chuck and hugged him and thanked him for all of this. Chuck hugged her back like he hadn't seen her in over a million years.

"Thank you." Sarah said "But it's getting late and I better leave."

"Oh, okay well see yah later then." Chuck said as Sarah walked up the stairs and left castle.

TWO HOURS LATER... The phone rang and Chuck rushed to pick it up hoping it would be Sarah.

"Chuck, hey, how did it go?" Ellie asked "Oh it's just you Ellie, uh yah it went good. She remembered something. She remembered the wedding video song and different parts of the night." Chuck replied

"That's great! I promise I will have that video montage mailed to you by Tuesday. Did the glasses come yet?" Ellie asked "Yah, they came this morning." Chuck replied "Well I will finish the video and get them back to you. See yah later, love you." Ellie stated.

"Love you too."


	5. Chapter 5

Sarah layed in her bed as she tossed and turned as if she were having a nightmare. She suddenly woke up gasping for air. She brushed back her hair back with her hand and wiped the sweat off her forehead. She turned on her side table lamp and lied back in bed. She stared at the ceiling for what seemed like hours. She then took her hands and placed them over her eyes before dragging them down to her cheeks. She put her hands behind her on the pillow and pulled herself up to a sitting position. She tried to recall her nightmare she had woken up from. Sarah thought long and hard before coming to the conclusion that her dream had involved Nicholas Quinn. She got out of bed and grabbed a drink of water. Sarah then picked up the phone and called Chuck.

CHUCK'S HOUSE

...

The phone buzzed on the bed side table by Chuck's bed. He woke up to the alarming sound and grudgingly picked up the phone. As soon as he realized it was Sarah he answered it immediately.

"Hello." Chuck stated as he placed the phone to his ear.

"Chuck, I think that I remembered something. In a dream." Sarah said feeling bad for calling Chuck at 4 in the morning.

"Really! In a dream?" Chuck wondered

"Well, more like a nightmare." Sarah said with a frightened tone in her voice.

"Are you okay?!" Chuck said now sounding frightened.

"No I'm fine. Thanks for asking." Sarah said as she smiled a little

"Well what was it about?" Chuck asked

"I was in a dark, old factory, I believe, and I was tied up in a chair. Quinn was there doing something and I was screaming in pain. That's all I remember." Sarah said Chuck covered his mouth and running his hands through his hair, realizing what his wife has just remembered.

"Oh I also remember these shiny cards that I kept seeing." Sarah said Chuck just figured out how Quinn got the intersect to erase her memory.

"Yah that is a memory." Chuck continued, "It is how Quinn used the intersect to torture you. He tied you up and showed you cards that made you flash. At least that is what I assume based on your information."

"But Chuck wouldn't- Ahhh!" Sarah screamed in pain She dropped the phone and fell to the floor holding her head.

"Sarah, baby! Sarah!"

Sarah continued screaming in pain as she held her head tight.

"Sarah, baby keep the phone on, I'm coming!" Chuck rushed out of his house with no shoes and still was wearing battlestar gallactica pajamas. He ran to his car and started the engine. He drove the car to Sarah's apartment running every red light and going way over the speed limit. He finally got to the apartment complex and got into the elevator. He then raced down the hall and tried to unlock Sarah's door. It was locked so he tried to call for Sarah but he could only hear her scream in pain. He took his foot and kicked the door open rushing to Sarah's side. He put one of his arms under her knees and one on her back and put her on the bed. He kept rubbing Sarah's back as he called Ellie.

"Hello?" Ellie said on the other end of the phone. "Elle I was on the phone with Sarah when she started screaming in pain. I went over to her apartment and she was holding her head. Elle I think it has something to do with the intersect. What do I do?"Chuck yelled as Sarah started to grab Chuck's hand.

"Okay first thing is to calm down. Now go get a rag and wet it with cold water." Ellie said Chuck rushed over to the kitchen and grabbed a rag and wet it with ice cold water. He ran back to Sarah and placed it on her forehead.

"K now what?" Chuck asked Ellie

"Okay, now go get her a couple of aspirin."

"That it?" Chuck asked "That should suffice. It just sounds like the intersect is causing a major migraine. She will still be in pain but try and keep her calm. If she flashes call but other than that she should be okay. If there are any more problems just call." Ellie said

"Thanks sis. Love you."

"Love you too." Chuck hung up the phone and rushed to the medicine cabinet in Sarah's bathroom. He grabbed a couple of aspirin and a glass of water for Sarah. He went over to Sarah who was staying to calm down with the rag being on her head. Chuck gave her the aspirin and the water and brushed the hair out of her face as she took the medicine. He gently stroked her back as she sat up.

"You okay." Chuck asked still rubbing Sarah's back.

"Yah. I'm better." Sarah answered

"You should get some rest and I promise I will fix that door." Chuck said

"Okay, and Chuck.. Thank you." Sarah said Chuck took the glass of water from her hands and placed on the kitchen counter.

"Well I better get go-"

"Chuck what if it happens again? The pain, what do I do?" Sarah interrupted

"Do you want me to stay here. I can just sit in the chair and check up on you every now and then. If that would make you feel better." Chuck awkwardly stated

"Would you?" Sarah politely asked

"Of course." Chuck would always be there for Sarah. Always. Chuck waited out the rest of the night checking up on Sarah. He would replace the rag on her head with a cold one and every time he did she would stir in bed. But he was gentle. Morning came and Chuck left. He told Sarah if she needed him to just call.


	6. Chapter 6

"Babe can you hand me the hammer?" Devon asked as he held a nail Ellie handed him the hammer and watched as he hammered the nail into the wall. Devon then took the white shelf and slid it onto the wall.

"Perfect! Now the nursery just needs to be decorated." Ellie exclaimed

"Alright! Let's go get some boxes." Devon said Both went into the hallway and grabbed some boxes and set them on the floral rug in Clara's room. Devon then opened up a box full of baby books and started taking them out one by one and putting them neatly on the shelves. Then all of a sudden the phone rang.

"I'll get it!" Ellie said running down the hallway into the kitchen on her left. Ellie picked up the phone realizing it was Chuck.

"Hey Chuck what's up?" Ellie asked

"Well, first of all thanks for sending me the video I wanted, and the intersect glasses came, but I don't think that it is very safe to import all that information into Sarah's brain." Chuck said hesitantly

"Why not? It should be totally safe." Ellie responded

"Well, Sarah has been having lots of migraines lately and I'm worried. She had a big one the other night, the night I called you, and she told me it felt like a lot of pressure on her head. If it has something to do with the intersect, I don't want to put those glasses on her. The intersect holds a lot of information, and I know it is out of her head, but I think these might be some after shocks, and I don't want to create any more damage to her head." Chuck stated in a stern and serious tone

"I understand, and I think you might be right. All that information at once could hurt her brain and I don't think we should take any chances." Ellie said

"Thanks for understanding sis." Chuck said

"I'm sorry Chuck, but on the bright side I have some good news!" Ellie said in an excited tone

"Me and devon are flying down to Burbank next week to get some things finished with everything at the bank. Since we did a short sale on the house, because we had to leave so quickly, it was left with the bank. But now somebody wants to purchase it so we have to come handle some things. But other than that I get to come see you! Plus my in-laws. However, I was thinking while I was down there I could do some tests on Sarah to make sure everything is going smoothly. If that is alright with her and you."

"It's fine with me, but I will have to ask Sarah." Chuck replied

"Hey Ellie I got to go Morgan just got here."

"Okay, love you." Ellie said

"Love you too, oh and you left your watch at my place by the way." Chuck said

"Oh that's where that went. I'll get in a bit, bye." Ellie concluded

"Bye." Chuck finished Ellie hung up the phone and went back into the nursery where Devon was trying to put together the new changing table.

"Hey babe are these instructions in Portuguese?" Devon asked

"Flip it over." Ellie responded

"Oh..." Devon replied Devon put together the changing table while Ellie put away all of Clara's small clothes and toys in bins. She hung up all of Clara's dresses and put all the extra diapers on the top shelf of the closet. After Devon finished putting together the changing table he put the pink sheets on Clara's bed, and the pillows on the navy blue chair next to it.

"That good baby Clara?" Devon said as he looked at Clara who was in the corner on a mat. She giggled when her daddy talked and kicked her legs in the air. "Awesome." Devon said

"Morgan!" Chuck called from the living room

"You ready for our Lord of the Rings marathon?" Morgan came walking down the hall with a slice of cold pizza on his plate and a glass of milk in his hand.

"What for?" Morgan asked

"What do you mean what for. So you can remember them all buddy!" Chuck said

"Remember why, I never forgot!" Morgan said

"Stop playing with me man. We started with Star Wars movies, then some old Battlestar Gallactica then we had a whole two weeks of Harry Potter, and for the past month we have been watching every cheesy Japanese fighting movie ever created! Now we are onto Lord of the Rings! Remember?" Chuck said

"Bro, I could never forget Lord of the freaking Rings! Or Battlestar Gallactica or Harry potter or all the amazing Japanese movies, and especially not STAR WARS!" Morgan pronounced

"Are you messing with me? You haven't remembered any of these for the past like three months!" Chuck said

"Yes I HAVE!" Morgan stated clearly

"Fine then tell me all about Lord of the Rings." Chuck demanded Morgan explained everything about Lord of the Rings from Frodo going on an adventure to bring the ring to the elves, to the fellowship forming, to the famous line "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!", to the fellowship breaking apart, then Frodo having to go with Sam. Then Gollum comes along and frames Sam so he can get the ring, but Frodo figures it out and they continue on their path to Mordor. Then he explains how the White wizard and Gandalf fight a lot and then he goes on and on about the fight with the ghost people and how they destroy the ring and good wins.

"Did you watch it without me?" Chuck asked

"What are you talking about man! I know all about the Lord of the Rings and of course I watched it without you, but that was months ago! Lord of the Rings has never been on the top of my movie watch list!" Morgan yelled

"So you remember?" Chuck asked

"Dude snap out of it and stop playing dumb! What have you been smokin'! Get your head into the game and let's just watch some Japanese horror film tonight." Morgan stated loudly

"Ok.." Chuck said.

They both sat down and watched The Ring. However, Chuck was still wondering how Morgan remembered all of that. He clearly hadn't watched those recently and he felt the same way about them before his brain did the whole "intersect melting thing". Then it hit him, morgan was starting to remember things.


	7. Chapter 7

Sarah sat on her bed watching her mission log. She watched it over and over as tears fell down her cheeks. Thoughts were spinning through her head like a wild tornado going over the plains of Oklahoma. Her mind was buzzing with questions. How can she not remember this man that she loved so dearly. They had dated for a couple of years and even got married. They were going to spend the rest of their lives together but at one single moment everything was ruined. The intersect destroyed a family once again. Sarah couldn't believe this. She didn't want to believe it. Her whole life with a wonderful man had been taken away and now she can't remember any of it. She had married a kind and loving man who treated her so well and it was all taken away in the blink of an eye. One man ruined her life and many others and now he has disappeared. Sarah knew that Chuck was doing everything he could to restore her memory but she couldn't help but think she would never get it back. knock knock Sarah turned off the television and wiped the tears of her face and slowly paced to the door. She opened the door and slightly gasped realizing whom it was.

"Ellie." Sarah said

"Hey."

Ellie greeted in a soft tone

"Uh, come in."Sarah said as she motioned into her apartment and then slowly closing the door,

"I was just about to come to Castle to do the tests Chuck was telling me about."

"Oh yah I know I just wanted to talk to you, without Chuck around." Ellie stated

"Oh okay, what did you want to talk about?" Sarah asked sounding a little bit confused

"How are you doing?" Ellie asked in a kind and soft tone.

"I'm, uh I'm doing good." Sarah replied "Sarah..." Ellie said,

"Sarah, don't lie, you can tell me anything." Sarah sighed and shrugged her shoulders

"Well, it's been hard dealing with all of it. I just feel bad for Chuck. He loves me so much but I don't know what to do." Sarah replied

"I hope you know this is isn't your fault. Chuck doesn't blame you at all and he won't push you to remember. Just know that." Ellie said

"Thanks Ellie." Sarah said softly

"Well we better get going, I have to go to my in-laws in about 5 hours and we need to get a lot of stuff done. Plus, Chuck wanted me to check on Morgan as well." Ellie said Ellie left the apartment and headed to castle and Sarah followed.

"Okay Morgan, you're just going to sit here and rest your head here. These are simulators that I am going to put on your temple. They will just monitor the brain making sure we don't miss anything. This will give a full scan on your brain that will show up on that monitor there. We don't want to miss anything. These things on your chest monitor your heart and this shot will hope calm your nerves so you don't tense up at all. We need your brain to be calm for this test." Ellie said

"Whoa! Chuck you didn't say anything about shots!" Morgan complained loudly

"Morgan," Ellie started, "Suck it up!" Ellie put the needle into Morgan's arm as Morgan squinted his eyes.

"Do I get a lollipop now?" Morgan pleaded

"Uh, no." Ellie replied Ellie continued working on the computer as the devices on Morgan's head did a full scan of his brain. About five minutes later Devon walked in through the door holding Clara and carrying a teddy bear.

"Devon, I thought I told you to drop Clara off at your mom's house." Ellie stated looking at Devon with a stern look on her face.

"Bad news babe, my dad has the flu and my mom is taking care of him. Looks like we won't be visiting them this week." Devon said

"Okay whatever, just come here and monitor all of Morgan's vitals." Ellie commanded

"Wait my vitals! No, I refuse!" Morgan yelled

"Morgan, your vitals are things like your blood pressure and heart rate." Devon said

"Oh..." Morgan replied

"Okay, which one of you two want to take baby Clara?" Devon asked looking at both Chuck and Sarah

"Uh, well, I have to use the bathroom, so..." Chuck concluded as he left the room

"I'll take her." Sarah said willingly

"Thank you Sarah." Devon said

"Okay Morgan role up your sleeves." Morgan rolled up his sleeves as Devon took his blood pressure. During that time Chuck came back from the bathroom.

"Results are up!" Ellie yelled

"Am I dying? I knew it! I'm dying" Morgan screeched

"Morgan, you're not dying, you're fine." Ellie said,

"In fact I have some good news."

"What?" Chuck asked

"Turns out that the intersect that was in Morgan's brain and in Sarah's brain, that caused both of them to lose their memories, wasn't what I thought it was." Ellie said calmly

"How do you mean?" Sarah asked sounding concerned

"Well turns out that since the intersect was such a huge amount of information to be put into the brain it caused swelling in the medial temporal lobe. Which is the part of the brain that controls memory. However, since Morgan had the intersect in his brain for a few months there has been a lot less pressure in that region particularly the cingulate gyrus, which is inside the medial temporal lube. So the whole limbic system in Morgan's brain was swelling. Except now he hasn't had the intersect in his brain for a while, so the swelling has gone down. To explain it better the mammillary body, which processes memory, was in a way clogged. Not literally, just figuratively. So it's like his brain didn't remember processing all those memories. The brain was just focusing on all the information it had just processed in such a short amount of time, that's what caused the swelling. So it turns out Morgan's memories weren't erased, just suppressed. So as the swelling continues to go down, the more memories will come flooding back. Does that make sense?" Ellie said

"Wait so you're saying that Sarah's brain is acting the same way? That her brain is swelled as well and once the swelling goes down her memories will start coming back?" Chuck asked sounding hopeful

"That's what I think. Of course I still need to test her brain and see if it is reacting the same way as Morgan's brain." Ellie said

"Okay then. Sarah, are you ready to be tested?" Chuck asked looking at her

"Uh, yah. Do you want to take Clara?" Sarah asked

"Oh yah sure." Chuck replied Chuck took Clara and Sarah sat down in a chair almost like the dentist has. Devon put all the devices, which scan the brain, on her head. He then took her blood pressure and heart rate and helped Ellie set everything up to monitor Sarah's brain. Ellie turned on the monitor to scan Sarah's brain. It took about 10 minutes before an image of her brain showed up on the monitor.

"Results are up!" Ellie yelled


	8. Chapter 8

Ellie pressed the enter key on her keyboard and loads of data started showing up on the computer screen.

"How are results looking sis?" Chuck asked with much hope in his voice

"Uh... Not so great." Ellie said with worry

"Wh- what do mean not so great?" Chuck stuttered

"Well, um, Sarah had the intersect for two days and flashed about 40 times before she uh, was... Anyhow, she has had so much pressure on her brain that her medial temporal lobe has swelled up to a great extent, which might have been what caused the migraines the other night." Ellie said

"Wait. So you're saying that she can't regain her memory?" Chuck asked

"No! Not at all Chuck. It just might take some time." Ellie replied

"Like how much time?" Chuck asked

"Well, there is no way to be certain, but I would estimate about three months if we treat the issue now." Ellie said

"Okay. Well how do we treat it?" Chuck questioned

"Well, I can get her some medication that will help with any migraines and will reduce the swelling. If you want to speed up the process I would keep a cold rag or a bag of ice on her head at night and anytime she had pain." Ellie responded

"Okay, is that it?" Chuck asked

"Well, you should also have some things to help her remember. Not pictures though. That might sound a little weird, but if you could find objects that she could keep around her apartment or something it will help." Ellie stated

"Why not pictures?" Chuck asked

"With the objects she can use her five basic senses more. She can feel it, smell it, see it, hear the sound if it makes noise, things like that. With pictures she can only see what the memory is, nothing else. Also, don't tell her about the objects. Just get a collection of them and put it in a box and give it to her. Don't be around when she opens it, it will just pressure her. Put all the pictures down in your house. We don't want Sarah to dig for the memories, we want them to just pop back." Ellie said

"Okay, sounds good." Chuck said

"Sound good to you Sarah?"

"Uh, yah. Ellie am I allowed to ask him questions?" She asked

"Try to keep them as yes or no questions. Also, try to relax for a while. I know you have been going on missions again but you need to rest if you want these memories back. You also don't want to put any more pressure on your brain, it's not healthy." Ellie stated

"Okay then." Sarah said

"What about me!" Morgan said "Is my brain unhealthy? Am I going to get cancer?"

"Morgan you should be fine, you haven't had the intersect in you for a while, your memories are coming back more natural than Sarah's are." Ellie said

"Uh babe we better go." Devon said,

"We have dinner reservations in an hour." "Well what about Clara? We can't drop her off at your parent's house anymore." Ellie remarked

"I can take her if you want." Chuck said

"Chuck thanks for the offer, but me and Devon were going to stay at a hotel overnight, it's a bed and breakfast. We wouldn't be back until noon tomorrow." Ellie said

"I should be fine. Why don't you just leave me a list of things I need to do and I will do them." Chuck said

"Oh, you're a life saver!" Ellie said handing him Clara

"No problem." Chuck said,

"Sarah, do you need a ride home?"

"Uh, no thanks, I have my car." Sarah replied

Chuck got the stuff he needed out of Ellies car and put it in the back of his car. He fastened Clara in a car seat and drove home. When he got home he sat the car seat down in the living room, along with everything else, being careful not to wake Clara up. He gently placed a blanket around her and rocked the car seat for a moment. Chuck sat up and walked over to the kitchen to grab himself some dinner. He heated up some leftover spaghetti and meatballs then sat down on the couch. He was about about half way finished with his dinner when Clara woke up and started crying.

"Hey, hey Clara, it's okay." Chuck softly said as he lifted Clara out of her car seat. Chuck set the baby down on a blanket and wrapped it around her. He then picked her up and held her in his arms. He rocked Clara back and forth until she finally started to settle down.

"Okay, can I finish my dinner now?" Chuck asked as he started to put Clara back in her car seat. She started getting fussy however so Chuck kept holding her.

"Well, I guess I will have my dinner later." Chuck put his plate on the counter and picked up the list Ellie gave him. It read... Please make sure Clara is in bed by 7:30, she needs a bath before bed and a warm bottle of milk. I left a bottle with you that can be placed in the microwave without harming the baby. Just place it in for 30 seconds. The bottle is in a sterile bag so you don't need to sterilize the nipple. Also there is a pack of diapers and wipes and 2 pajamas and an extra pair of clothes are in the bag as well, just in case. She sleeps with a pacifier and she will probably want to hold her blanket as well, it's the pink one with bunnies on it. I think that should be all. If you have any questions give me a call.

"Okay then Clara, should we give you a bath? This shouldn't be too hard." Chuck said


	9. Chapter 9

"Okay, now I am soaked in water, and I officially hate the sound of a rubber ducky." Chuck said as he put Clara into her pajamas. Chuck picked her up off the blanket and she started to scream and cry.

"What are you crying about? I have changed you, fed you, bathed you!" Chuck said as Clara continued screaming

"Are you thirsty?" Chuck rushed over to the fridge and grabbed a bottle and heated it up. He then handed it to Clara who knocked it out of his hands.

"Ahh..." Chuck said looking at the puddle of spilled milk on the floor

"I know! I'll call Ellie." Chuck proceeded to call Ellie,but received no answer multiple times. So he decided to call Devon, same thing. So he tried calling Alex.

"Hey Alex I need your help calming Clara down please. She won't stop crying and I don't know what to do." Chuck said

"Chuck, that's great and all, but I am in the middle of something very important and I can't talk right now, sorry." Alex said and then she hung up Chuck didn't know elsa at to do and Clara was still screaming. His fingers ran through his contract list on his phone. His mom probably wouldn't be available, Morgan would be no help, Jeff and Lester are well, Jeff and Lester. So there was really only one person left, Sarah. Chuck tapped his fingers on the counter for at least 3 minutes before hitting the call button.

ring, ring, ring, ring

"Hello." Sarah answered "Hey, umm Sarah, I sort of need your help. Clara won't stop crying I think she is sick.

Do you think she could have colic?" Chuck asked

"Chuck, how old is Clara?" Sarah said obviously knowing the answer.

"I believe she is 16 months." Chuck replied still trying to calm the baby down.

"K, uh Chuck, she can't have colic if she is 16 months old, it is very rare, the baby only gets colic when they are around 3-6 months, and it's usually caused by the brand of formula the baby is using, and Clara is using regular milk and solid food at this age, so it ain't colic." Sarah stated

"K," Chuck said,

"Then what do I do?"

"Did you call Ellie?" Sarah asked

"No, why would I call Ellie! That's absurd!" Chuck said sarcastically sounded frustrated.

"Chuck! You need to stop spiraling. It's not the end of the world." Sarah said calmly

"Sorry." Chuck apologized Sarah told Chuck to do numerous things, any thing she could think of. Each of them chuck obeyed, but none of them worked. After chuck spent 40 minutes trying to calm the baby down, he finally just asked Sarah if she would come over and help him. She replied with a yes and drove over.

There was a small knock on the front door of Chuck's apartment. Chuck rushed to the door still holding a screaming Clara. Chuck opened the door relieved to see that it was Sarah.

"Here, come in." Chuck said as he motioned toward the living room Chuck shut the door behind her and walked over toward Sarah.

"Chuck, what have you been doing, it looks like a bomb exploded in here!" Sarah said looking around the room in pure shock

"Well, I've tried to give her different types of food. She refused to eat anything, and she has thrown her bottle several times. Her toys and blankets are everywhere and now I can't find the diaper bag." Chuck said sounding exhausted

"Here, hand me her." Sarah said Chuck then handed the baby to Sarah and she proceeded to try and calm the baby down.

"Does she have a blanket that she is fond of?" Sarah asked

"Oh, yah, she threw that too, and that is also lost." Chuck replied Sarah walked down the hall and opened a towel closet and grabbed a soft blanket that was on the bottom shelf. She placed Clara on the blanket and wrapped her in it. She then cradled the baby softly with Clara's head near Sarah's shoulder. Sarah bounced her back and forth while rubbing the baby's head. Clara soon started calming down.

"Did she have a bath already?" Sarah asked

"Yah, why?" Chuck said

"Well she is covered in food and she has milk in her hair." Sarah replied looking at Chuck questionably

"Well, that's probably from trying to calm her down." Chuck said

"Well I am going to give her a bath real quick if I may, and you can go work on something if you want." Sarah offered

"Uh, are you sure cause I can- "No it's fine, it won't be long." Sarah said as she proceeded toward the bathroom Chuck went to his room and grabbed his laptop off of his bed. He opened up files for Carmichael industries and started updating their website. Sarah headed to bathroom and turned on the water that flowed into the bathtub. She placed Clara and began shampooing the baby's soft hair. She then washed the rest of her body and dried her off, placing her in a different pair of pajamas. Sarah carried Clara into the living and gave her a bottle of warm milk to help her fall asleep. Sarah lied down on the couch with Clara on her chest wrapped in a blanket. Chuck was still in his bedroom working and slowly fell asleep. Chuck woke up the next morning and walked out into the living room. Sarah was holding Clara, who was still asleep, and was looking at old pictures that were around the house. Chuck knew that Sarah wasn't supposed to be looking at pictures, since that is what Ellie said, but at this moment he didn't care. Sarah turned towards him and looked him straight in the eye.

"I remember this." Sarah said holding up a picture of her and Chuck. Sarah had her arms around Chuck's neck and Chuck was holding her up. They were outdoors and they looked happy together.

"You remember that?" Chuck asked while looking astonished

"Yah, they were our engagement pictures. I remember really well, it's like the memory never went away. I remember how I felt and what I saw. I remember that I love you." Sarah said while a tear rolled down her cheek.

Sarah placed Clara down in a bassinet and looked at Chuck. He was pursing his lips together like he always does when he is happy.

Sarah started, "I remember that day, we had that photographer named Daniel or David or something like that. He made us do all kinds of weird poses and stand in weird positions. He uh, made the pictures turn out great though. You know I remember our first mission together. We went to a meeting where there were lots of people. The waiter had a bomb in a food cart. You disabled it using that Irene Demova virus. I remember when we uh, thought we only had a few seconds to live, and I uh, kissed you and you kissed me back, and we didn't ever talk about it for weeks. Then Bryce and me got back together and you were super jealous, and then you started dating this other girl, and I became jealous. I remember when we started looking for your dad and you discovered things you never knew about him. I remember taking down the ring with you and how Shaw kidnapped me and you saved me. I remember I was drugged and I was about to be thrown off a bridge and you shot him. You shot him to save me. And that's when I knew for sure that I truly loved you. Then we ran away from the CIA, but just got thrown back in basically. I remember when, uh, Shaw killed your dad and how you were devastated. I remember moving in with you and how I wouldn't unpack for over 6 months. Then you had the intersect taken out and then you got kidnapped and I had to get you from Thailand. I remember you talking about kids and how I freaked out, and I remember when you tried to propose on the balcony and I was put into Volkolf industries. But you did eventually propose when we were at the hospital while Ellie was in labor. Chuck I remember so much, but most importantly, I remember you. I remember how much you care about me and how much I care about you. I love you Chuck." Chuck hugged Sarah and then she did the unthinkable. She kissed him and he kissed her back.


	10. Chapter 10

"I love you Chuck" Sarah said with so much passion in her eyes.

All of a sudden Chuck woke up to a loud crash in the kitchen and the sound of a screaming baby. Chuck rushed out of his bedroom into the living room and kitchen area. The first thing he saw was Clara on the ground screaming her face was bright red and her pajamas were half off as if she was being changed. Then he heard a loud scream of pain. He turned toward the kitchen to see Sarah holding her head screaming in pain. Chuck stood frozen at the sight for what seemed like an eternity. At this moment he realized the dream wasn't real, his wife was still gone and possibly forever.

"Ahhh!" Sarah screamed She was curled up near the counter with her hands clenching her hair and head. She was bright red as if she wasn't getting enough oxygen and she covered in sweat. Her body was shaking and her eyes were squeezed shut. Chuck rushed over to her holding her in his arms. "Sarah... baby it's me!"

"Ahhh" Sarah screamed this time her body flipping on its back over Chuck's knees. Sarah started shaking and her chest was still was beating up and down. Chuck felt her forehead and it was extremely hot. Chuck placed Sarah down gently and grabbed a rag and before he got it wet with cold water Sarah started thrashing around. She was having a seizure. Chuck dropped the rag and rushed to Sarah holding her loosely. Her eyes were open but we're almost completely rolled back, and she seemed to be unaware of everything around her. Chuck scooted her toward the middle of the kitchen so she wouldn't hit anything. He held as she was shaking and shivering. Her body was still beating up and down, and her mouth was open almost gasping for oxygen. Sarah then started choking on vomit, so chuck turned her to her side to avoid choking to death. However, Sarah was still gasping for air. Chuck ripped the top of her shirt open so it was loose and allowed her more air. After about ten more seconds Sarah started to calm down. Her eyes returned back to normal and her breathing slowed to a regular pace. Chuck held her for a few more moments before her eyes closed. Chuck then realized the sound of crying still coming back from the living room. He gently placed Sarah down and ran to Clara. He finished getting her out of her pajamas and changed her diaper and slipped her into a light blue polkadot onesie with some jeggings over that had ruffles in the back. He gave her a teething ring and some toys and went back to caring for Sarah. He went back into the kitchen where she was still passed out. She looked extremely exhausted and sick. He picked her up and put her on the bed in his bedroom and left her there to sleep as he tended for Clara.

... Meanwhile somewhere in Russia...

BAM! Casey pulled the trigger and the bullet went straight into the center of the target.

"That was good!" Gertrude said looking over at Casey

"I could do better." Casey said Soon after Casey's phone started to buzz in his pocket. He picked up the phone grunting when he saw the face of the short bearded man. He reluctantly picked up the phone holding it to his ear.

"Hello." Casey said in a very monotone voice

"Hey Casey, it's the Morgan, I need to talk to you." Morgan replied

"I'm listening." Casey said

"No, I need to talk to you in person." Morgan said

"Why..." Casey said wondering what trouble the idiot was in now

"It's about Alex." Morgan said Casey grunted like he was about to kill Morgan.

"Don't worry she's fine." Morgan said

"Where do you want to meet?" Casey asked

"Wherever, I just want to meet soon." Morgan replied

"I'll be in Hamburg in two days, let's meet there." Casey said

"Is that in North California?" Morgan asked

"It's in Germany you imbecile!" Casey replied smacking his head

"Germany!" Morgan yelled

"Do you wanna talk to me or not?" Casey questioned

"I'll be there." Morgan said as he grunted ...

Back in Echo Park Chuck was feeding Clara some applesauce when there was a knock on the door. He carried Clara to the door and opened it.

"Oh good you're not dead!" Ellie said as she walked inside

"Why would I be de-

"I was talking to Clara. You called last night and I didn't see it until this morning." Ellie replied cutting him off

"I'm not that bad of a babysitter you know." Chuck said

"What did you call about anyway?" Asked Ellie as she took Clara

"I called about Clara, I couldn't get her to calm down, but she calmed down eventually." Chuck said

"How did you get her to do that?" Ellie asked

"I called Sarah and she came over." Chuck said as started to make his coffee

"You called Sarah!?" Ellie asked sounded surprised

"Well no one else picked up." Chuck said

"When did she leave?" Ellie aksed

"She is still here." Chuck said as he poured his coffee

"She spent the night!" Ellie said almost choking

"Yah she fell asleep on the couch. Which reminds me Elle, I think Sarah needs an MRI."

"Why?"

"She had a pretty bad seizure this morning. You can see the puke over there that I haven't cleaned up yet."

"Oh my gosh Chuck! Is she okay."

" I don't know she is still passed out, she is in the bedroom."

"Can I go check on her?"

"Yah, go ahead."

Ellie headed toward the bedroom. She opened the door and walked toward Sarah. However, as she felt her forehead Sarah awoke.


	11. Chapter 11

"Hey Sarah." Ellie said as she walked into the room. Sarah had just woken up and was looking very tired.

"How are you feeling?" Ellie asked Sarah had a questioned look on her face while she looked at Ellie.

"Chuck told me you had a pretty bad seizure that lasted for maybe 3 to 5 minutes, after that you passed out and he called me." Ellie responded

"Uh I'm doing okay." Sarah said as she started to sit up. That is when Ellie noticed the blood dripping on the pillow.

"Oh my Gosh, Sarah you're bleeding!" Ellie said sounding scared. Sarah looked down at her pillow and then felt her head. Ellie rushed over and started to examine Sarah's head.

"Chuck, get in here!" Ellie yelled, "ah this is really deep and long. You're definitely going to need stitches."

"Where did this come from?" Sarah asked gritting her teeth while Ellie was tugging her hair around the gash to clean it up

"It must have happened during your seizure. " Ellie said, "Chuck get in here!" Chuck came rushing into the room. As he soon as he saw the blood he started to freak out.

"What happened?" Chuck asked sounding frantic

"I think she hit her head during her seizure." Ellie said trying to sound calm,

"Yah this is definitely going to need stitches. Sarah can you please sit up for me." Sarah sat up and started to grit her teeth.

"What's wrong?" Ellie asked "My back, it like stings but feels bruised." Sarah responded

"May I take a look?" Ellie asked kindly

"Yah." Sarah said

Ellie lifted up the back of her shirt to reveal a huge mark that consisted of the colors red, blue, purple, and black. Ellie gasped at the sight.

"What is it?" Sarah asked sounding worried Ellie motioned for Chuck to come see. Chuck responded the same way as Ellie did when he saw the horrific sight.

"Sarah, your back looks like some decided to drag you across the carpet in one spot for three days, and repeatably pounded it with a brick. It doesn't look good." Ellie said

"Here." Chuck said as he took a picture and showed it to Sarah

"Ow." Was all Sarah could say,

"That looks a lot worse than it feels."

"Well, we need to get you to the hospital and get your head stitched up and your back probably needs an x-ray, but don't take my word for it, it could be just a bruise. But after we get your head checked, come to me and we'll get you an MRI right away." Ellie said

"Okay." Sarah responded

Later at Westside Medical Hospital...

"Okay Sarah, your head is all done." Said Dr. Hatch,

"You're free to go now."

"Thanks." Sarah said as she left the room heading to Ellie

"How was it?" Ellie asked

"It was fine, they had to do staples though, not stitches." Sarah said

"Well that sound like it hurt, anyways, let's go get you that MRI." Ellie responded

"Okay Sarah we are just going to run a blood test, and we need a urine sample as well, and then we can get prepped for your MRI." Said Dr. Griffiths

"Okay." Sarah responded

"Okay, your files have been sent in, and I've done the required tests, so Dr. Walia will be in to see you soon."

"Okay Sarah, I need you to lie down on your back and I will just put this blanket over you and this bed will then be rolled back into the machine. The machine will tell you things like 'hold your breath' and 'don't look into the light,' stuff like that. It is quite loud so be prepared. The IV will put fluids into your system, and it will make you feel like you wet your pants, but you won't, I promise. You ready?" Dr. Walia said

"Yah I'm good."

Sarah replied

Sarah sat in the hospital room again as she awaited the results of her test. This time Ellie came in with the doctor to explain the results of the MRI.

"So Sarah your condition has actually improved. The swelling in the lobe has gone significantly down. Can you tell me what you remember?" Dr. Young asked

"I don't remember anything." Sarah replied

"What do you mean, Sarah you have lost five years worth of memory, you should be regaining it." Dr. Young responded sounding confused

"Five years? I only lost about 2." Sarah said also sounding confused

"Sarah, you have lost five years! Two weeks ago you didn't even know who Chuck was! If you lost only two years you would know who he was and you would be dating him." Ellie chimed in

"I am dating Chuck." Sarah said,

" We got together a couple months ago. Well technically a while ago, but to me it seems we were in Paris just a couple months ago"

"No, Sarah, you guys got together two and a half years ago, Sarah you're married to him." Ellie said

"I know that, he told me, but I still know him as if we are dating, we're just taking things slow, from what I remember." Sarah said

"Sarah you're telling me that you remember everything from five years ago to three years after that?" Dr. Young said

"Well I never forgot that. Did I?" Sarah asked

"Yah, Sarah your memory is coming back!" Ellie beamed

"Really I forgot those three years?" Sarah questioned

"Not anymore." Dr. Young said

"Well how did this happen?" Sarah asked

"Well it seems that your brain has stayed significantly calm these past few weeks and you've just been regaining memories. Well, it's a lot more technical than that, but it's easier to explain this way." Dr. Young explained

"How long until I get the rest of my memories back?" Sarah asked

"Well, the years you do remember are things you have been used to your whole life, that is probably why it came back so quick, loving Chuck is something new that you have never experienced before, so probably a month or two." Ellie said Suddenly there was a knock on the door.

"Come in." Dr. Young said The door opened with a squeak and another doctor appeared.

"I have the results back from the earlier tests."

"Okay then," Dr. Young replied, "We'll let you two discuss." Dr. Young and Ellie left the room and Sarah was left alone to discuss the test results.

"So how was it?" Ellie asked

"It was fine, everything seems normal." Sarah said

"Are you sure? You look a bit worried." Ellie asked with a worried expression on her face

"Yah, I'm totally fine, just a lot to take in you know." Sarah responded

"I get it, lets get you back home to Chuck." Ellie said


	12. Chapter 12

"Hey how are you doing? Ellie told me the results, are you okay?" Chuck asked sounding concerned

"No, I'm actually happy, really happy." Sarah said

"Are you sure, you don't look to hot." Chuck said as he felt her forehead,

"Yah, you have a fever I'm gonna get you a cold rag."

"She is fine Chuck, it's just from the MRI. Plus, she has had a long day." Ellie interrupted

"Here, you should go lie down." Chuck said as he hand Sarah the rag

"Yah, I'm gonna go lie down in the bedroom." Sarah said

Sarah headed toward the bedroom and opened the door. In about five minutes she was fast asleep.

"Thanks for everything El." Chuck said

"It's no problem. But i'll tell you one thing Chuck, that woman loves you again, by some miracle she regained her memory, and she may not tell you it, but her eyes light up when she sees you, that woman loves you way more than a fat kid loves chocolate." Ellie said

TWO WEEKS LATER

"Sarah, you are still not looking to good." Chuck said as Sarah walked into the kitchen

"Chuck, I'm fine." Sarah said sounding a tad bit annoyed

"I still think you should go see a doctor." Chuck suggested

"I said I'm fine!" Sarah snapped, "Can we just talk later."

"Uh, yah when I get home from work." Chuck said

Chuck spent most his time at work thinking about what Sarah wanted to talk about rather than concentrating on his work, but alas the time came for his work shift to be over.

"So what did you want to talk about?" Chuck asked

"So you know how I have been regaining memories, well I have gained a few more since my visit to the doctor, but there is something I didn't tell you." Sarah said as she was pacing around the room looking at the floor.

"Oh I knew it, you're probably dying or have cancer, you probably have some weird disease I've never heard of or-

"Chuck-

"Or you are being forced into some other country for weird tests, or you-

"Chuck- "

-have a sprained gall bladder or your an alien or worse! You could be a inter-

"I'm pregnant!" Sarah finally said

2 weeks ago Berlin airport

"Okay numbnuts, what did you want to talk about, and why are you dressed fancy?" Casey asked staring down at the small bearded man

"Follow me, I have reservations at a restaurant with a name I don't know how to pronounce."

"Where is it?" asked Casey

"I don't know, but my GPS does, follow me to my rental car."

"Turn right in 4 miles." The GPS said

"Okay here we are! The best restaurant in town!"

"This is McDonalds." Casey grunted

"What the website said something different?" Morgan protested Casey grunted

"So what do you want!" Casey said over the screaming children's voices

"Nummer 47!" The german lady at the cash register yelled

"Ooh! My happy meal!" Morgan squealed as he got up

"sie ist Ihre glückliche Mahlzeit und Spielzeug sir." The lady said

"Qui Qui!" Morgan replied

"Okay, what did you want to talk about?" Asked Casey

"I wanted to ask for your daughter's hand in marriage, but I, uh need your permission. Please sir, I love Alex so much and I would do anything in the world for her. I will fight for her until the end of time, please Casey, accept my proposal." Morgan pleaded Casey stared at him for a while with squinted eyes before he grunted.

"Okay, but if you break her heart, I will personally remove your manhood! Understand!" Casey said very sternly

"Yes sir." Morgan gulped

"Now I want to see the ring?" Casey insisted

"Okay one sec." Morgan put down his cheeseburger and started to rummage through his pockets.

"Here." Morgan said

"YOU GOT HER A RING POP!" Casey grunted

"No, that is just my snack for later! You really think I would get the most beautiful woman in the world a ring pop!" Morgan yelled,

"This is the actual ring!" Morgan said handing Casey the ring box.

"Oh! Wow..."

One and a half weeks later...

"Morgan where are we going?" Alex asked as she continued walking with her eyes covered by Morgan's hands

"You'll see..." Morgan said,

"Okay now." Morgan took his hands off her eyes and showed her the view. There was a picnic blanket set up with candles and popcorn with a white sheet hung between two trees. There was a projector behind the blanket and a movie resting on top. However, the best part was the view, you could see for miles from the top of this mountain and although the sun wasn't setting yet, it was still beautiful.

"Oh my gosh! Morgan this is wonderful!" Alex squealed

"And... To top it all off, we are watching one of your favorites, and my personal favorite, The Proposal." Morgan said as he held the movie and showed it off. Morgan and Alex played the movie and sat down on the blanket. They enjoyed the picnic and the red wine Morgan had brought, but mostly they just enjoyed the company of eachother.

"Ahh! The movie stopped." Alex whined

"Oh it's okay I can fix it." Morgan said Morgan twisted the cables as if he were fixing them, but little did Alex know this was all planned.

"Hey, Alex will you give me a hand?" Morgan asked Alex got up and walked over to Morgan but got distracted by the sunset.

"Oh my gosh! Morgan look!" Alex exclaimed

"It's just beautiful." Morgan responded, "Just like you ."

Alex smiled and rested her head on his shoulder until Morgan reached into his pocket, and got down on one knee and opened the velvet ring box revealing a magnificent ring. Alex looked down at him in shock, her hands covering her mouth and tears forming in her eyes.

"Alex, will you do me the honor in becoming my beautiful, loving, sweet, gentle, and sexy wife?" Morgan asked adding emphasis on the end. Alex nodded as a tear fell down her cheek. She held her hand out and Morgan slipped the ring on her finger before standing up to kiss her.


	13. Chapter 13

"What did you say?" Chuck asked

"I'm sorry Chuck, I didn't mean to tell you like this. I kept thinking there would be a right time to tell you, but I just, I don't know. This is just so stressful. I haven't been feeling well, I've been super depressed. I don't have any recolution of the last year, let alone wanting a child. I barely remember getting engaged and here I am, married to a man for over a year, and pregnant with a child. I just don't know what to do." Sarah replied as she started to cry

"Oh honey..." Chuck said as he walked toward Sarah He grabbed Sarah gently and pulled her close. He put one hand on her back and the other on her head. He held her close while he rubbed her back. He let her stay there while tears stained his shirt. Chuck kissed her head as a tear fell down his cheek as well. He hated to see his wife so upset.

"It's okay sweetheart. I'm not upset, and I'll be honest with you; I don't know what your going through, but I'm here, and you're safe I promise." Chuck said soothingly

"What am I supposed to do, I don't anything about being a mother, I don't know how to raise a child! I didn't have a good father I never was around my mother, I barely even know how a woman gives birth how am I supposed do this. Honestly Chuck, I didn't even know I could get pregnant. I've been on so many missions I have gotten shot and tortured and beaten, I didn't know if my body could handle much more. Here I am though, I'm pregnant" Sarah cried

"It's okay, we will just take this one step at a time okay. Everything will be fine." Chuck said soothingly

"You don't know that, it's so hard. I'm just extremely confused." Sarah said now starting to calm down

"Well, I know you don't remember anything, I understand it must be really hard, so the choice is yours." Chuck said taking a deep breath, "What do you want to do?"

"What do you mean?" Sarah said while Chuck stared at the floor. Chuck looked down at his hand and played with his thumbs. He then looked up at Sarah and pursed his lips together.

"Do you want to keep it?" Chuck asked trying not to show the sadness in his eyes. Sarah put her head down while her mouth lay slightly open. She turned away before pursing her lips together and tapping her foot slightly that it was barely noticeable.

"You don't have to answer right now." Chuck said while rubbing her arm.

"I will give you some time." Chuck took his hand off her shoulder and got up. He looked back at Sarah who was still looking at the ground. A soft tear fell from her eye as Chuck looked at her. Chuck pursed his lips together once again and decided to leave Sarah alone for a bit. With that, Chuck left the room.

"Chuck what's wrong?" Ellie asked on the other line of the phone

"It's Sarah..." Chuck continued holding back the tears

"Chuck what's happened?" Ellie asked sounding worried

"When you took Sarah to the hospital, did Sarah tell you anything surprising?" Hey questioned

"No..." Ellie responded

"Well, she said she wanted to talk to me after work today, so I come home from work, and I couldn't find her so I went to the bedroom and she was pacing. That's when I knew something serious was up. She asked me to sit down, and then I started jumping to serious conclusions; but what she told me what more serious than I thought."

"Chuck is Sarah okay?"

"Ellie she's pregnant." Ellie took a deep breath before answering.

"Okay, what did you say?" She asked

"I asked what she wanted to do." "Meaning..."

"I asked if she wanted to keep it."

"Chuck..."

"I know el."

"What did she say?"

"She hasn't said anything for two days now. She staying at her apartment and hasn't called or texted once. I haven't even seen her. What do I do."

"Well, Chuck, this is your baby too, my advice, decide this together."

"Thanks El, and uh please don't tell anyone, I don't need the peanut gallery, meaning Morgan, to know right now." Chuck said

"I understand." Ellie answered,

"love you."

"Love yah too."

"Yo Chuck, what's up?" Morgan asked as he rand down the main aisle of the buy more.

"Nothing much." Chuck said

"How Sarah?"

"She good, haven't heard from her for a while but her memory seems to be coming back."

"Yah how much?"

"Well think of our life as a TV show, season one starting the day we met, each year being a new season. Sarah is in season 4 about episode 5. Somewhere around there."

"Oh that's good, does she remember that she loves you?" Morgan asked "I'm not sure buddy, I'm not sure."

It was almost midnight when Sarah called. Chuck wasn't anticipating it, in fact, he didn't even look who the caller was. But when he picked up the phone and heard the sweet voice on the other end, he recognized it immediately.

"Hey Chuck." Sarah said

"Hey, what do you need." Hello asked

"I umm, I uh, I want this baby Chuck." Sarah responded

"..."

"Chuck?"

"Thanks you Sarah." Chuck said as a tear fell down his face.

"One more thing, open your front door." Sarah said as she hung up. Chuck set the phone down and slowly paced toward the door. He opened it and there stood Sarah. She was beautiful as ever and she was smiling.

"I love you Chuck." Chuck opened his mouth to respond but before he knew it she grabbed his face and kissed him. He grabbed her waist gently as he pulled her close. He shut the door and continued kissing her. It was that night that Chuck welcomed his wife home.


	14. Chapter 14

Sarah woke up in the middle of the night from Chuck who had suddenly changed positions. She sat up but was shocked to see chuck was sitting up too with his eyes wide open.

"Chuck, what are you doing awake?" Sarah asked No answer

"Chuck?" No answer

"Chuck! Answer me, why do look so worried?"

"Sarah, how far along are you?" Chuck asked still not looking at her

"Uh, about 8 weeks now, why?" She replied Chuck continued his blank expression as he stared straight ahead.

"Chuck, why? She asked again Chuck still stared into space. Sarah had had enough and she grabbed Chuck's face and forced him to look at her.

"Chuck what is wrong?" Sarah questioned sounding worried

"Sarah you were with Quinn 8 weeks ago." Chuck said

"Okay..." Sarah said sounding confused, "Chuck, Quinn is dead, he isn't going to hurt me anymore."

"Sarah your 8 weeks pregnant and 8 weeks ago Quinn kidnapped and tortured you. Are you not putting these two things together!?" Chuck said loudly

Sarah opened her mouth slightly and released Chuck from her grip. She turned her body so she was now staring straight ahead. The silence went on for around 10 minutes as Sarah tried to hold back the tears. Chuck let her be for a minute before she started crying. He scooted toward her and pulled her close so her head was on his chest. Sarah was really quiet. Her cries weren't loud or noticeable, just soft tears that fell down her cheeks. Chuck held her back while he kissed the top of her head. He had expected her to act differently. He was expecting her to be completely reluctant to the idea. He expected her to reassure him and believe the idea was impossible, but instead she was quite open to the possibility. She still hadn't gained her full memory back and had no recollection of any of her time with Quinn during her capture. Eventually Sarah fell back asleep with her head laying on Chuck's chest and he held her protectively. He stayed up the rest of the night contemplating the whole situation.

Sarah didn't mention anything about the baby the next day. She went about her daily tasks without saying a word. She barely talked to Chuck the whole day. She was simply doing her job. She and Chuck decided that they were going to sell the buy more as Casey suggested. They decided to open Carmichael industries above ground and enlisted Casey in the project. They had already purchased to building they needed and we're in the process of financing bits and pieces. It was that night Sarah stayed awake with Chuck, until Chuck finally broke the ice.

"Sarah you haven't said a word today." Chuck said,

"I need to know what you want to do." Sarah put her hand on her stomach and turned toward Chuck.

"I want it tested." Sarah finally said,

"I want to know."

"Okay, I'll uh, set up and appointment soon." Chuck replied

...

5 days later

"Okay Mr. And Mrs. Bartowski your test results are in. Our DNA fingerprinting clearly showed us that you're in the safe zone. Congratulations. Would you like to do an ultrasound right now to see the baby?" Dr. Paxton said

"Yes please." Chuck stated with a huge smile on his face. The doctor brought out the machine and set everything up before their baby appeared on the screen in front of them.

"You're baby is extremely healthy and is progressing along just fine. If you listen closely you can hear the heartbeat." Dr. Paxton stated

"Chuck, that's our baby." Sarah said happily

"Yah, it it isn't it." Chuck said as he smiled a sigh of relief.

...

4 months later...

"White or brown?" Chuck asked

"Huh?" Sarah replied obviously distracted

"Do you want the white or the brown crib?" He asked again

"Uh, brown." Sarah said

"Any reason in particular?"

"Well were having a boy, so it seems to fit the theme don't you think?"

"Okay. Help me pick out a bouncer please." Sarah walked over examining all the bouncers that were displayed.

"The cream one with the vibrating thing, and uh, the gray and yellow chevron swing."

"Should we get two?" Chuck asked

"Why on earth would we do that?" Sarah questioned

"Well what if we have twins?"

"Chuck, do you have twins on your side?"

"No"

"And, I don't have twins on mine..."

"So..."

"Chuck, we're not having twins!"

"Well-"

"Chuck unless I ate a magical bean and a our son climbed up the bean stock and grabbed the golden egg, and it hatched into another baby, we're not having twins. There has been one baby in there for 5 and a half months now. 1 baby, 1 heartbeat."

"But-"

"Stop spiraling!"

"Chuck, you have paint everywhere! Sarah said as she laughed at Chuck

"Here this will help." Chuck said Chuck ran towards Sarah and wrapped his whole body around hers engulfing her in a giant bear hug.

"Now all the paint is on you." Chuck said as he laughed at Sarah

"Chuck you got it in my hair!" Sarah yelled

"You got it in my hair!" Chuck mimicked

"Shut up!" Sarah said

"Do the walls look nice though?" Chuck asked

"They look amazing." Sarah replied,

"This little boy is so spoiled." Chuck and Sarah stared at the light gray walls and the white Wood paneling on the back wall against the crib.

"It's perfect." Sarah said,

"Now all we need is the crib, rocking chair, curtains, shelves, dresser, changing table, and all the decorations to be brought in by you."

"Oh boy..." Chuck sighed

...

"Hey Sarah where are you?" Chuck asked over the phone.

"Sorry the client meeting ran way late, I'm leaving the office now." Sarah replied

"Okay love you." Chuck said

"Love you too."


	15. Chapter 15

It was almost midnight when Chuck woke up to the sound of his phone ringing. It was winter in Burbank almost christmas and the slightest bit of snow had started to fall. Chuck awoke from his sleep on the couch glancing at his phone. Sarah was calling him.

"Probably traffic right now with the snow. Stupid California drivers." Chuck said to himself Chuck grabbed his phone and slid the answer key.

"Hello."

"Is this Chuck Bartowski?" Asked the person on the other end Chuck sat straight up wondering why Sarah wasn't talking to him.

"Who is this?" He asked

"Sir this is Claire Wright. I was driving on the highway when I passed a car smashed on the side of the road. I stopped by and found your wife Sir your wife Sarah has been in a terrible car accident I called 911 already they are on their way. I'm on 5th south near Walgreens the street is quite empty please hurry.

" Chuck hung up the phone grabbed his keys and headed out the door. He hoped in his car and drove, fast.

About 3 minutes later he arrived by the totaled car. He hopped out and headed toward his wife.

"Sarah, oh my gosh, Sarah!" Chuck yelled as he ran He got to her car and knelt down by his wife. Her body was scratched everywhere and her head was bleeding bad. The airbag had gone off and the window beside along with the windshield had been shattered. The drivers side of her car was smashed in leaving a bruise on her left arm and her stomach had been pierced from a shard of glass. He rushed to the back of the car grabbing the first aid kit. He ran back to Sarah and started to check for any broken bones. None seemed to be hurt except for her left arm which may be just badly bruised. He checked her forehead first and and realized the paramedics would have to work on that, he then checked the side of glass in her stomach which had just grazed it and stuck to her shirt. He pulled that out and his wife woke up from her unconscious state.

"Baby I'm here," Chuck said as he stroked her head. "The ambulance is- It was then Sarah became aware of her conscious state and started to squint her eyes and scream in pain. She held her side and threw her head back and gritted her teeth to try and bear through the sharp stabbing pain. Chuck looked where Sarah was holding her stomach and sure enough there was a piece of glass or plastic, bigger than his hand, stabbed deep into her right side. He knew not to pull it out. So he held her hand until she could speak.

"Chuck." She groaned once more as she held her stomach.

"The baby- Ahh!" Sarah was in a lot pain.

Chuck noticed the ambulance coming and he unbuckled Sarah's seatbelt. He removed any excess pieces from around her body and maneuvered her slightly so the EMT could get her out easily. The ambulance arrived and two men loaded Sarah onto the gurney and placed her in the ambulance. Chuck thanked the lady who had called and hopped into the ambulance.

At the hospital. The doctors had rushed Sarah into the hospital and informed Chuck they would be doing immediate surgery Chuck sat in the waiting room dialing Ellie's number.

"Hey Chuck, what's up." Ellie said on the other end.

"Ellie, Sarah was in a car crash tonight, it was, uh, really bad and I-" Chuck couldn't finish his sentence

"Chuck, how bad?"

"I'm at the hospital right now and Sarah is in Surgery. It was a hit and run. The drivers side was completely smashed in. The side window and windshield shattered, plus Sarah had a huge price of glass or metal or something in her stomach. I couldn't see it much it all happened so fast. I got there and then the ambulance arrived. It was really bid and deep Ellie. She had a huge gash on her head too. She's not in good condition elle. I don't know if she will survive this one elle. We're running out of miracles here and then the baby. The impact was hard Elle and the gash in her stomach I just-

"Chuck listen to me. You need to suck it up for now. They are going to call you back there and if your not strong for your wife she's gonna give up too. You need to hang in there. I know it's hard and I don't know the outcome Chuck. You're going to be called back after they finish the surgery and you're going to have to stand by your wife and be strong for her. She's in a lot a pain and you can't stop that pain Chuck, but you can stand by her side and be strong. I'll be honest with you Chuck I don't think the baby survived. If the impact was as strong as you say it was, it is unlikely he's okay. But Chuck promise me you will be strong for Sarah. It is hard for a mother to lose her child, and it won't be easy for you as well. I have seen many parents in here drift apart from the loss of their child. Chuck you need to promise me you stay be her side. Promise me."

"I promise."

"Chuck I know it's hard, but Sarah has taken bullets she is strong. She can hold on, but remember marriage is a two way promise. You need to hold on too. How long has it been since you got to the hospital.?" She asked

"five maybe six hours-

"Chuck bartowski" the nurse said

"They called my back Ellie, I got to go."

"Promise me Chuck."

"I promise." Chuck got up and followed the nurse back to the room.

"She woke up maybe two minutes ago. Her vitals are steady and we got everything under control. There is no significant damage and no brokers bones. For this accident, this really is a miracle. I'll be honest Mr. Bartowski, she should not have survived this." Said the nurse. Chuck walked into the room and knelt down by Sarah's side. The doctor was on the other side checking her IV. The nurse left the room to let the doctor talk.

"I'm doctor Furnell, how are you?" He said as he shook Chuck's hand

"I'm calming down." Chuck said as he brushed Sarah's hair out of her face.

"Well I have good news and bad news. The good news is the surgery went fine. It was a large piece of glass in her stomach but it missed every vital organs by less than a millimeter. It was hard to get out, but other than that she was fine. We stitched up her head and her arm is just a large bruise. She made it out alive and I don't know how. There is no damage whatsoever the worse thing is the 10 stitches in her head. An accident like this could have cause brain damage, paralysis, or death and you came out with a small cut. You my dear are lucky to be alive."

"What's the bad news?" Sarah asked Chuck and Sarah bother knew what he was going to say, but neither wanted to belive it. The doctor clasped his hand together and looked at the ground before he looked at them.

"Your baby did survive the crash. We had to do an emergency C-section. We have him in special care right now. However he is in such a condition where he will not survive. He's a little under two pounds. His lungs are not fully developed along with his skull and spine. He's most likely won't make it through the night. We can bring him in so you can see him would you like that. We would have to take him back soon, and you can't hold him." Chuck was softly crying while Sarah was trying to hold beck her emotions.

"We would like that please." Chuck stated

"Very well." Their son was soon brought in. He was in a bed covered in glass. He has tunes and wires all over him and he was so small he could fit in Chuck's hands. They were not aloud to hold him they could only touch his little body through the two holes on the side.

"We don't have a name." Sarah said to Chuck

"Well we talked about it." Chuck said,

"Like Lucas."

"Ahhh yes I suggested that and what did you say..." Sarah said

"Luke, I am your father." Chuck said shamefully

"Exactly. How about Finn?" Sarah asked "I like Finn." Chuck said, "Let's do Finn."


	16. Chapter 16

"Chuck, what's wrong?" Sarah asked as nurses and doctors came racing into the room toward their baby.

"Chuck!" Sarah yelled at his blank face

"Ma'am we're going to need to take your baby now." one of the doctors said

"What's wrong with him, why do you need to take him!?" Sarah asked in an apprehensive tone

"Doctor we need an EF stat!"

"We have a possible HFpEF possibly an HFrEF!"

"I think it's a VSD!"

"We need to get him to the ICU!"

"Get and ACE inhibitor ready!"

The doctors and nurses rushed around the room left and right checking monitors and gathering supplies before rushing the infant out of the room. Sarah was screaming wanting to know what was wrong and trying to get up while Chuck was holding her back.

"Ahh!" Sarah screamed while clutching her stomach and fell back onto the pillow

Chuck lifted up the sheet and pulled Sarah's shirt up to see her stomach.

"Sarah you ripped three staples out you need to be more careful." Chuck said

"Chuck, where's my baby? Where did they take him!" Sarah asked while crying

"They took him to the intensive care unit something is wrong with his heart I think." Chuck stated barely above a whisper

Sarah stood blank faced for a moment before turning to Chuck.

"Be honest with me, no sugar coating it." Sarah took a breath before continuing, "Do you think he'll be okay?"

Chuck stared at the floor for a while twiddling his thumbs before looking at Sarah. Her face was stained with tears, her eyes were heavy and had seemed to have lost all life.

"I don't know Sarah, part of me wants to believe he is but the other-

"Chuck-

"No, I don't think he's going to make it Sarah."

Sarah tried to hold back the tears. She couldn't understand why this was happening to her. Why did she have to suffer. She has already lost so many people she loves, why another, why her own baby. She couldn't fight it any more. She cried for everything. For taking the shortcut home instead of her regular path. For working late when she knew she shouldn't have. For not seeing the car on her right. She cried for her son. Chuck held her in his arms while she cried into his chest not saying a word. They both knew the truth, they just didn't want to say it. They knew they would be leaving the hospital without their baby, their son.

"Sarah, your stomach, it's bleeding we need to get a doctor in here. The staples need to be put back in." Chuck said slowly releasing Sarah from his arms

Chuck turned around and hit the emergency button and called for a nurse.

THREE HOURS LATER

Chuck and Sarah were both laying on the bed in the hospital room, Sarah asleep on his chest. Neither one of them moved, neither one of them talked about what they both knew was coming. A doctor then entered the room with a solemn face. He approached the couple slowly trying not to make eye contact.

"How is he." Sarah asked sitting up with the smallest gleam of hope in her eyes

"I'm sorry to tell you; but, your son did not make it." The doctor stated with a melancholy face

Sarah fell back down on her pillow burying her face in Chuck's chest and silently sobbed. Chuck rubbed her back and smoothed out her hair while her tears stained his shirt.

"What happened?" Chuck

"He had a Ventricular Septal Defect. It's when there is an abnormal connection between the lower chambers of the heart. That was the main cause. He was also extremely premature and his lungs were not strong enough. I'm sorry, we did all we could. A nurse will be in to see you soon." With that the doctor got up and left

1 HOUR LATER

"Hello, I'm Dr. Hendershot, I'm just here to check up on Sarah and read some reports to you." The doctor said as she walked into the room. "I'm just going to check your blood pressure."

Dr. Hendershot wrapped the blood pressure cuff around Sarah's upper arm and it began its process.

"All right it's 121/80, you're perfectly fine." The doctor said, "Okay I'm just going to lift up your shirt to check the wound."

The doctor lifted up Sarah's hospital gown and lowered the blanket down just below her abdomen. She then placed her hands on different parts of Sarah's stomach and applied pressure to different parts of the abdomen.

"Hmm, you're stomach is quite bloated in the lower midsection." The doctor said, a look of confusion spread across his face

"Is that bad?" Chuck asked sounding apprehensive

"I'm not sure, I'm going to have to run some tests." The doctor replied

5 hours later

Sarah was once again asleep while Chuck held her hand. The test results still hadn't come back yet and Chuck couldn't sleep. He was worried. He was worried about everything. His wife had just been in a traumatic car accident, has had multiple surgeries and tests, and lost her child all in just a couple days. He knew she was tough but he was worried that this might break her. Chuck's thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the door opening.

A doctor Chuck hadn't seen before entered the room with a clipboard in his hand and a look of worry etched on his face. Chuck's face dropped as he now feared the worst.

"Hello, I'm doctor Grandstaff, I'm going to be taking over for a bit. Do you mind waking your wife up for a bit, this is important."

Chuck gently shook his wife and Sarah's eyes quickly fluttered open. Chuck nudged his head toward the doctor and Sarah sat up, apprehension written all over her face.

"Your test results have come back. Sarah, you haveAsherman's Syndrome. Meaning, you have a few Intrauterine adhesions. They form when scar tissue builds up between the inner walls of the uterus causing the walls to bind together. I believe they have formed from previous surgeries or injuries that you have had. I looked at your medical record and it's quite extensive. You have even had procedures in 3rd world countries and I believe this is was caused this, considering medical technology and cleaning procedures are not good."

"Well, what does this mean? Is she really sick or what?" Chuck asked sounding scared

"Adhesions like this can result in infertility or increased miscarriages, meaning-

"I can't have children." Sarah interrupted, barely above a whisper. Tears were streaming down her face

"Essentially yes." The doctor solemnly replied

"Well, isn't there anything you can do?" Chuck cried

"We can perform a hysteroscope to remove them, however there it may not help the miscarriages or infertility." The doctor said

"So I can't ever get pregnant or give birth?" Sarah said trying to stay strong

"Not necessarily, there is always a chance you can have children, it's just low; but, not impossible. You would have carried your son full term if you hadn't gone into early labor due to the accident. So you never know, miracles happen everyday. We will perform the procedure tomorrow and send you home in 2 days. You can always try again in about 4 months."

With that said the doctor stood up and left the room.


	17. Chapter 17

6 DAYS LATER

Chuck and Sarah drove home from the hospital in silence. When they arrived they both hopped out of the car and Chuck offered to get the hospital bag. Sarah walked up to the apartment and unlocked the door before opening it and stepping into the familiar house. She set her keys down and walked down the hallway toward her and Chuck's bedroom. She slowly came to a stop as she looked into the entry way of the unfinished nursery remembering how different their lives were just a few weeks ago.

 _Sarah and Chuck were sitting in the nursery going through all the gifts they received from the baby shower._

 _"Hey, Ellie sent this one." Chuck said as he grabbed the knife to open the package, "What the crap is this?"_

 _Sarah turned her head towards Chuck and started laughing while Chuck opened the box and took out the contents inside. He twisted it around, sniffed it and proceeded to put it over his eyes all while Sarah continued laughing._

 _"Why are you laughing?" Chuck said, "What is it! What am I holding?"_

 _"It's a breast pump, Chuck." Sarah replied, "So I can store milk so I'm not a walking milk machine."_

 _"Wait so you place it there!?" Chuck said as he pointed at Sarah's chest._

 _"No Chuck I place it on my ears." Sarah said sarcastically_

 _"Hey, no need to be rude, you don't know every machine I have, remember that one time when you-_

 _"DO NOT REPEAT THAT, YOU SWORE NEVER TO REPEAT THAT! Now keep folding those baby clothes." Sarah yelled at him_

 _Chuck quickly placed the breast pump down and turned to the box full of baby clothes._

 _"I don't understand why babies need so many clothes! I mean you don't even have this many clothes, and that's saying something!" Chuck blurted out_

 _"Okay, Chuck, you're losing brownie points real fast over there. I recommend you shut your mouth before I make you sleep on the couch." Sarah said in an angry tone_

 _"Oh honey, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend you, I was just kidding around, please forgive me." Chuck said with puppy dog eyes and his bottom lip drooped_

 _"Chuck you're fine, I'm not mad." Sarah said_

 _"Ellie got ANOTHER dress for us!" Chuck yelled as he tossed the dress at Sarah_

 _"Hey at least this is only the second one covered in glitter." Sarah replied as she put it into a different box_

 _"She is so insistent that we are gonna have a girl NOT a boy. Even though she has seen the ultrasound pictures!" Chuck replied in an annoyed voice_

 _"Chuck it's okay, we may have a girl sometime." Sarah replied calmly_

 _"Your mom says she thinks we're going to have 7 boys." Chuck stated_

 _Sarah dropped the package she was holding and fell to her knees and started to cough. Chuck quickly got up and ran to her side._

 _"Honey, what's wrong." Chuck asked_

 _"SEVEN BOYS!" Sarah yelled "I can't handle seven kids; let alone seven BOYS!"_

 _"Sarah, I_ know, _I can barely handle Clara, let's just start with the one kid for now." Chuck said as he helped her up and continued folding._

 _"Sarah look at this one!" Chuck stated with excitement_

 _Sarah turned around to see Chuck holding a small white onesie with the phrase "snuggle this muggle" on it._

 _"You're such a nerd!" Sarah stated as she threw a lime green burp cloth at him._

 _"Yah, but I'm your nerd." Chuck said as he kissed Sarah._

 _He pulled Sarah close and held onto her waist as he continued to kiss her._

 _"How long do we have until your meeting?" Chuck whispered in her ear_

 _"30 minutes." Sarah seductively replied_

 _"Perfect." Chuck smiled as he picked her up_.

That night, their lives changed forever.

-  
Sarah slowly entered the nursery and walked toward the far wall where the crib stood. She brushed her hand across the blanket that lay across the front rail.

Sarah reached down inside the crib ignoring the pain in her stomach as it hit the side. She grabbed the little blue bear that leaned up against a corner. Her mother had made it for her when they had found out they were having a boy. She held it close to her chest as she squeezed her eyes shut to avoid crying. Still holding the bear, she walked over to the closet. She set the bear down on a shelf and ran her hand across the onesies that were hung up. Her hands brushed along colors of blue and gray until she stopped and pulled out a cream colored onesie that Chuck had given her when she told him she was pregnant.

Sarah slid the soft fabric off the tiny hanger. Her eyes glanced over the words that were embroidered into the soft material.

'Always, forever, my mama you'll be'

At this Sarah broke down. She slid her back down the side of the wall until she reached the ground. She cried out for her lost child, the pain in her stomach, and the nasty scar that would eventually form into a painful reminder of her dead son.

Chuck opened the door to the car that led to the backseat. He reached into grab the hospital bag before he suddenly stopped.

 _"Chuck?" Sarah asked_

 _"Yes?" Chuck responded in a questioning tone_

 _"Why are you installing the carseat? I'm only five months along." Sarah asked_

 _"Well, we bought it today and I felt that I would forget to install it and then you would go into labor in 4 months and then we'd be all happy until we come out to the car and, uh oh, there would be no carseat. Then you would get all mad at me and you would start crying and I would feel bad, and-"_

 _"Ok I get it!" Sarah responded sounding annoyed_

 _"I just don't want to forget." Chuck reassured her and gave her a kiss on the forehead_

 _"I know, it's just the whole thing is just so nerve wrecking." Sarah said as she fell into his embrace_

 _"What part?" Chuck asked_

 _"Everything is so scary and frustrating. It's too much sometimes." Sarah cried_

 _"Here let's go inside and talk about this." Chuck said as he led Sarah inside_

 _Chuck led his wife over to the couch and sat down before her. She rested her head against his chest and cuddled up to him._

 _"Okay, tell me everything that's bothering you." He uttered_

 _"No, it's a stupid thing to worry about anyways." Sarah replied starting to get up_

 _Chuck gently pulled her back and turned her so she would face him. He then proceeded to rest his forehead against hers and brush some hair out of her face._

 _"It's not stupid Sarah. Please tell me." Chuck pleaded_

 _"The whole thing is so overwhelming. Going to the doctor and making sure the baby is alright and people asking me all the time how I'm doing. I don't even have all my memories back and people act like I'm all there, but I'm not. I'm not Chuck, and hate pretending to act like it! Everywhere I turn there's a face I don't recognize or something I don't understand. I feel so out of place. The only time I feel safe is when I'm here, but then my mind starts to tell me that the only reason you are here is because of the baby. I'm so afraid I'm gonna wake up one day and you and the baby will be gone and I'll be back to square one. I feel so useless all the time. Plus, once the baby comes what am I supposed to do? I don't have the slightest idea of how to handle a baby. Everywhere I turn there is something new that guarantees my child will be perfect. What if I mess up? What if things go wrong? How can someone like me raise a kid. All I have known are scams and ruthless killing. I can't have a baby! I'm so scared Chuck! Everyone keeps telling me I'm going to be the perfect mother, but how do they know that! How can they be sure? I don't know how to do anything. I can barely change a diaper. How am I supposed to calm it or feed it! Chuck what am I supposed to do? Do I use formula or do I breastfeed? Ellie said either is fine, but everyone else says it's better to go natural cause formula can harm the baby. I can't do this Chuck! Please help!" Sarah pleaded while she sobbed_

 _"Oh, Sarah, come here.'" Chuck said as he opened his arms to her_

 _Sarah went over to Chuck and quietly cried into his chest while Chuck enveloped his arms around her._

 _"I don't know what to do." Sarah cried_

 _"Just breathe and take it one step at a time. You're not alone in this. I will be by your side every step of the way no matter what. I'm not going to leave you. You can count on me. And you're not going to be the perfect mother, there is no such thing; but, I know you, and I know you will you will be the best mother you can be. I know how much you love your baby and that love will just grow, I promise. I know you, and I know you will do anything for the ones you love, no matter how difficult. Just remember Sarah, there is more than one type of a good mother." Chuck concluded as he kissed her head_

 _"Thank you." Sarah whispered_

Chuck' s hand brushed across the carseat. The empty carseat that was supposed to hold his son. Now there was no baby to place in it, and there will never be.

Chuck slowly grabbed the bag and went inside the house to find Sarah in the nursery softly crying. Chuck went and sat by her side and cradled her in his arms. Neither spoke for hours they just sat there staring at the nursery that will forever be empty.

"I don't want a big funeral." Sarah suddenly spoke

"What?" Chuck asked

"I just want me and you. I want a simple headstone and no ceremony. I just want something simple. Please." Sarah responded

"Are you sure?" He questioned

"Yes, I don't want anybody's sympathy. I don't want to hear any 'it'll be okay' or 'he's in a better place.'" Sarah finished

"Okay." Chuck said

Sarah then broke down and started to sob again.

"I just want him here! Why does everything bad always happens to us Chuck?"

"Sarah, it'll be-"

"No! Do not tell me it will be okay! It will never be okay! Don't you understand! I've lost my baby and my ability to have children! All of my happiness is gone! And nothing that you or anybody else says will bring him back! Why did I join the CIA! They took all my happiness away! All the times I was beaten, tortured, and raped has led to me losing my child and my chance to even have anymore! All the injuries I sustained and procedures I've had, they've damaged my body beyond repair. Nothing good has come out of the CIA! Nothing!"

"Not even me?" Chuck quietly asked

"Oh, Chuck I didn't mean it like that." Sarah said as she continued to cry

"I know, but we will get through this together, okay." Chuck said as he took her into his embrace

"Okay." Sarah whispered

"I love you." Chuck said

"I love you too."


	18. Chapter 18

4 WEEKS LATER

"I cannot believe you made me come all the way from Russia for this!" Casey grunted

"Well, Sarah is still in recovery and the only other person to help me is Morgan." Chuck replied

"Chuck what is in this box!" Morgan asked as he came up the stairs carrying a box

"Pillows." Chuck replied, "See why I needed your help Casey?"

"Why couldn't you wait to move in until after I returned from Russia?" Casey asked

"Because, we also have to move into the new office this week and I thought this would just be a bonus." Chuck replied with a smirk on his face

"Why did you decide to move so suddenly anyway?" Casey asked as he picked up another box

"Sarah wanted a fresh start, and soon." Chuck solemnly said

7:00 pm

"Sarah, I'm home!" Chuck called as he walked through the front door, "Sarah?"

Chuck hung his coat up and walked down the hall toward the bedroom

"Sarah?" Chuck whispered as he walked into the bedroom in case she was sleeping

"Sarah!" Chuck yelled again after he looked in the bathroom and bedrooms

Chuck walked outside to where the car would be parked. They only had one car now since Sarah's lotus had been totaled in the accident. Chuck left the car for Sarah and caught a ride to work with Morgan. The car was still in the lot.

Chuck grabbed the keys and walked out the door knowing exactly where she was.

Chuck drove up in front of the graveyard and got out of his car. He walked up behind Sarah who was kneeling in front of their baby's headstone. He sat next to her and silence and put his arm around her. She placed her head on his shoulder and intertwined his hand with hers.

"Ellie called today." Sarah whispered, "She's pregnant."

Chuck pulled Sarah closer to him and she rested her head on his chest. He brushed her hair out of her face and kissed her forehead as they both started to silently cry.

It started to rain.

"It never rains in Burbank and it decides to now! Stupid weatherman." Chuck said

Sarah let out a soft chuckle as she turned her head to look at chuck.

Chuck stood up and took her hand.

"Come on." He said

He gently pulled her up and wrapped his arms around her waist and she wrapped her arms around his neck. They began to sway back and forth Chuck twirling Sarah every once in a while. Sarah placed her cheek on Chuck's shoulder while he rubbed her back.

"It will get better." He whispered in her ear

"Lets go home." She replied as she broke their loving embrace

Chuck and Sarah walked toward the car and precede to unlock it. It was pouring by now.

"Chuck unlock the car, I'm freezing."

The car unlocked and they both got in. Chuck put the keys in nd turned. The car wouldn't start. He tried it again. It still wouldn't start.

"Can you hotwire a car?" Chuck asked

"Yes, but I have do go under the car and it takes forever and I'm freezing. Plus, I just had surgery, I can barely get out of bed let alone climb under the car. Let's just walk. Do you have an umbrella?"

"No."

They got out of the car and started the 5 mile walk home

"What are gonna tell people when they ask?" Chuck asked

"Ask what?" She replied

"When we're gonna try for another one. What do we say?"

"Nothing."

"What do you mean nothing? We have to tell them something."

"Why? Why can't we just say we don't want to have kids. That it's just not in the cards for us?"

"Because my entire life I've talked about having a big family. People would know something is up."

By this point both had stopped on the sidewalk and were now standing in the rain.

"Well it's not going to happen Chuck!"

"Don't you think I know that! I was there! I pulled you out of that car I drove you to the hospital I was there when they gave us the results I was there when our son died in our arms!"

"Well I can't give you a child! I'm sorry! But you know what there are plenty of other women out there with a functioning uterus, you can sure as hell go to them!"

Sarah stormed off at this point trying not cry. She ran down the sidewalk.

"Sarah wait!" Chuck said as he ran after her

"Sar-

"Ahh!" Sarah screamed as she clenched her stomach and fell to the ground.

"Sarah!" Chuck ran after his wife and knelt down beside her.

"I'm fine." Sarah replied as she began to stand back up

"Here, let me he-"

"I said, I'm fine!"

Chuck took a step back to give Sarah some room to stand up. She began to walk as he traveled behind her in silence.

"Sarah, you're bleeding."

Chuck rushed in front of her as she collapsed to her knees crying. Chuck gently picked her up.

"Lets go home."

An hour later Chuck later down beside Sarah on the bed. The bleeding had been resolved but they were still soaking wet.

"I'm going to go take a shower." Sarah stated as she got up from the bed

"Do you need anything?" Chuck asked

Sarah shook her head and then sat back down.

"Okay we will talk." Sarah said sounding defeated

"Good." Chuck said as he sat up quickly, shaking the bed

Sarah hissed in pain as the bed moved.

"Oh my gosh, are you okay!? I'm so sorry." Chuck said with a worried face as he hesitated to touch her

"I'm fine. Just please be more careful."

"I'm so sorry" he said as he scooted closer to her

"Ahh!" Sarah screamed in pain

"Sarah are-

"Just don't move! Please." Sarah said as she tried to hold back tears.

"I'm bleeding." Sarah stated

Chuck immediately lifted up Sarah's shirt to reveal her stomach

"I don't see any blood." Chuck said

"Its not there." Sarah said as she winced in pain

"Oh." Chuck said worriedly as he understood what she meant. "Do you want me to check?"

"No, I need to go to the hospital." Sarah said as she attempted to stand up

"That's a lot of blood." Chuck said

Chuck walked over to Sarah.

"This is gonna hurt." Chuck said as he lifted her up and rushed her out to the car. He placed her into the front seat and then he hopped in the driver's seat.

AT THE HOSPITAL

"You just tore about 5 stitches." The doctor said as he examined Sarah

"From what?" Sarah asked

"Probably just sudden movement. It's fixed now. Just be more careful." The doctor replied

2 weeks later

"Chuck, you look down." Morgan stated

Chuck, Casey, and Morgan were all sitting at the table going over plans for Carmichael Industries. Chuck had his head in his hands and was staring out into space.

"He's lonely." Casey grunted

"Oooooooohhhhh, I have just the cure for that!" Morgan yelled excitedly

"What?" Chuck mumbled

"Rose petals, scented candles, and fresh sheets!" Morgan yelled

"That won't work numbnuts!" Casey grumbled

"It always works." Morgan corrected

"Not when your wife just had several major surgeries." Chuck stated

"Oh yah, how long?" Morgan asked feeling bad

"94 days, 7 hours and 21 minutes, give or take a few." Chuck said as he put his head on the table

"Don't sound too desperate." Casey said sarcastically 


	19. Chapter 19

**TRIGGER WARNING:** MENTIONS RAPE; NOT TOO EXPLICIT, IT'S AN IMPORTANT SCENE

94 days 7hours and 21 minutes later

"Alright, rose petals, check! Scented candles, check! Music, check! Sexy boxers, check! Curtains closed, not check!" Chuck exclaimed as he set down his clipboard and went to close the curtains.

"Chuck, I'm back!" Sarah called from downstairs

"Wife, check!" Chuck exclaimed as he checked the box on his clipboard, "I'm up here!" chuck called

Sarah placed her keys on the counter and went up stairs.

"I see you unpacked and, oh wow!" Sarah said as she walked into the master bedroom.

"Guess what day it is?!" Chuck said as he was holding a calendar with a date circled in red.

Sarah walked up to him and grabbed the calendar out of his hands and looked at the circled day.

"I'm gonna go with 'sex day' based on the bolded, red, and underlined words followed by four exclamation points."

"I'm excited!" Chuck said with a cheeky grin

Sarah glanced down and looked back up at him: "I can see that." Sarah replied

"You ready?" Chuck asked

"I don't know Chuck, it may not-"

"Hey, the doctor said it's fine, and if it hurts we'll stop."

"Promise?"

"Promise, now shut up and kiss me."

THE NEXT MORNING

"That was the best night of my life." Chuck stated

"Well, it's about to be the worst day of your life because we are about to spend $50,000 on our new office building." Sarah stated as she curled up next to Chuck

"On the bright side we get a week of vacation next week so we can go see Ellie in Chicago." Chuck stated

"We still haven't entered our submissions for the 'big gender reveal yet.' She needs them by Friday." Sarah said

"I'll email them today. You said boy right?" Chuck questioned

"Yep, and I'm right." Sarah said bluntly

"No, they are totally having another girl."

"Wanna bet?"

"Yah I do! Cause I am right!"

"Okay, since you think so highly of your decision, loser gets to be on bottom for a week."

"Soooo, how did 'sex day' go?" Morgan asked Chuck who walked into the office with a cheeky grin on his face.

"Great, we only got a half an hour of sleep and I lost two pounds." Chuck replied

"Wow." Morgan stated mesmerized

"Hey, have you entered your gender reveal submission yet?" Chuck questioned

"Yep, did it last night. She is so having another girl!" Morgan replied

"I know, right!" Chuck said, "Sarah doesn't think so. We even have a bet on it."

"Oh, what does the loser have to do?" Morgan asked as Casey walked into the room

"What are we talking about?" Casey asked

"Chuck and Sarah have a bet on the gender of Ellie's new baby." Morgan told Casey

"Boy." Casey stated bluntly

"No!" Chuck and Morgan yelled simultaneously

"Okay." Casey replied in a sarcastic manner, "So what happen when you lose the bet."

"I am NOT going to lose!" Chuck shouted angrily

"Uh, huh, when have you ever won a bet against Sarah?" Casey replied with a smirk on his face

"Never." Chuck mumbled, "But there is a first for everything."

"What happens when you lose!" Morgan interrupted

"Loser has to be on the bottom for a week." Chuck replied

"Harsh." Casey replied, "But it's nothing new Bartowski."

Casey patted Chuck on the back in a rough manner causing Chuck to flinch.

"Wait?" Morgan interrupted, "You guys have bunk beds?"

At noon Chuck had finished his work finding new clients. He shut down his computer and walked down to the lunchroom where Sarah was.

"Hey bad news." Sarah said as Chuck sat down next to her, "Ellie is postponing the gender reveal."

"When can we go?"

"Three weeks."

"Why?"

"The baby wasn't facing the right way, they should be able to find out in 2 weeks though."

"Ugh."

"Hey, there is good news as well." Sarah said taking a bite of her food, "Our clients canceled, they don't need us anymore. Don't worry we still get the money for the time we worked; however, that does give us an extra week to stay in Chicago."

"Really?"

"Really."

3 WEEKS LATER

Chuck and Sarah had arrived in Chicago safely and had gotten a taxi to Ellie's house.

"Hey, you guys made it!" Ellie said as she greeted the couple at the door.

"Uncle Chuck!" Clara babbled as she ran past her mom

"Hey sweet pea!" Chucks said as he picked her up, "Who is almost three?"

"I am!" Clara said as she clapped her hands

"Are you excited about the new baby?" Chuck asked

"I'm gonna go put our stuff in the guest room." Sarah interrupted as she headed upstairs.

"Yah!" Clara replied in an elated voice

Sarah walked up the stairs with her suitcase in hand while Ellie followed behind her with Chuck's stuff.

"Down here on the right." Ellie said

Sarah walked into the guest room placing her suitcase on the bed. The room was decorated with a queen sized bed framed by dark wood. There was a lavender quilt on top of it with pillow shams that matched. The bed was opposite a small window that faced the east and was covered in sheer curtains. A dresser lay on the adjacent wall and had the same dark oak as the bed. A television was mounted in the corner with a small table below it. The floors were covered in stained wood and a soft, gray carpet was placed on top. The walls were white brick and the decorations on it complimented the brick nicely.

"Bathroom is on your right and linen closet is opposite the room." Ellie said as she left the room

Sarah sat down on the bed and softly felt the quilt beside her.

"Aunt Sarah!" Clara yelled as she ran up the stairs.

Clara came bursting in the room and jumped onto Sarah's lap. Sarah slightly hissed in pain as Clara pushed on her stomach.

"Did I hurt you?" Clara asked her eyes filling with tears

"No, you're fine, just try and be a little more careful okay, Aunt Sarah's stomach is still healing." Sarah replied as she held the toddler

"Can I see?" Clara innocently asked

Sarah noticed Chuck standing in the doorway with a look of concern on his face.

"Clara, I don't think that's the best-" Chucks started

"Yah." Sarah said softly as she sat Clara beside her.

Sarah lifted up her shirt enough to show the large red scar that wrapped around her abdomen.

"It's big, huh." Sarah said as she looked at Clara's shocked face

"Does it hurt?" Clara asked

"Sometimes." Sarah replied

"Can I feel it?" Clara asked

Sarah hesitated for a moment as Chuck came to step in.

"Yah, just be gentle." Sarah replied

Sarah gently grabbed Clara's hand and placed it on her stomach. Clara moved her hand side to side feeling the bright red scar.

"It feels funny." Clara giggled

"Yah, it does, doesn't it." Sarah laughed back

"Why is it there?" Clara asked

Chuck stepped further into the room worried about how Sarah was going to react.

"They had to take my baby out." Sarah replied

"Where is the baby now." Clara perked up as she looked around the room

"He died." Sarah whispered after a moment of hesitation

"Why?" Clara questioned

"He wasn't strong enough." Sarah answered

"I'm strong." Clara said happily as she flexed her arms

"That you are!" Sarah laughed as she picked Clara up, "You want to show me your toys?"

"Yah! I just got a new Elsa doll! Have you seen the Elsa movie?"

-  
"Okay everyone! It's time for the big reveal!" Devon announced

Everyone put down their food and made their way over to the living room where a big box with a string hung from the ceiling

"Alright, we had our friends put this together for us, so this will be a surprise for us too. You know what happens. Clara gets to pull the string and either blue or pink confetti will come out." Ellie told everyone

"Okay Clara, pull when I say three okay." Devon said

"Hey I'm almost three!" Clara yelled happily as she held 3 fingers up

"Yes you are almost three." Ellie laughed

Clara pulled the string and the box opened sending blue confetti everywhere.

"Clara why'd you pull it?" Devon asked

"You said three." Clara replied

The room laughed

"It's a boy!" Ellie shouted as she kissed Devon

"Told you." Sarah proclaimed as she nudged Chuck

"Yah, yah." Chuck sounded defeated

Sarah walked over to Ellie and embraced her sister in law.

"Congratulations El!"

"Thanks, hey are you doing okay?"

"Yah, I'm fine."

"Sarah I know you-"

"Ellie congrats!" Chuck interrupted

"Thanks so much!" Ellie replied, " Sarah, we're going to talk after."

-  
"Sarah, what's going on?" Ellie asked

"I told you I'm fine." Sarah laughed

"Sarah I know you, you're not fine. What's going on?"

The silence lasted for what seemed like an eternity. Both girls stood in the empty room. Sarah was facing the window and Ellie was looking at her with worry.

"Sar-

"Why did you have to get pregnant!?" Sarah yelled as she turned around

Ellie was taken aback by the comment and look at her with a shocked face. Sarah realized her mistake and put her hands over her mouth and shut her eyes tightly.

"I'm sorry Ellie, I didn't mean that. It's just been so hard." Sarah cried

"I know you didn't. It's okay."

"No it's not okay! Nothing is ever going to be okay!"

"I don't know what to tell you, I've never had this happen. I just know you're strong, Sarah, I know you can get through this. And, hey, it's been a few months you guys can start trying again."

Sarah slid her back down the door until she hit the floor. She put her hands over her mouth and squeezed her eyes shut trying not to cry. She then shook her head.

In a soft voice barely above a whisper she said, "We can't."

"What?"

"We weren't going to tell anyone."

"Tell anyone what?"

Ellie dropped down to Sarah's level and took Sarah's hand in hers.

"It's okay, you can tell me."

"I can't carry a child, my uterus is too damaged."

"Sarah." Ellie breathed as she started to cry as well

"I'm fine."

Sarah quickly got up and left the room. She rushed down the stairs and out of the little house.

"What the- Sarah!" Chuck yelled as he raced after her.

Sarah called a taxi and quickly got in.

"Where to ma'am?"

"Somewhere quiet."

Chuck also called a taxi and hopped in quickly.

"Where-"

"Follow that taxi!"

Sarah's taxi had arrived at the park while Chuck's was still half a mile behind. She hopped out and paid the driver before quickly rushing out of the car and into the park covered with trees.

"I'll get out here!" Chuck yelled at the driver.

The driver pulled to a halt and Chuck paid him before rushing toward Sarah. When he got to the big open field, he couldn't find Sarah. After what seemed like hours of searching he found her sitting down, leaning against a tree crying. He walked over to her and sat down beside her putting his arm around her frail body shaking with sobs.

"You ran away." Chuck broke the ice

"You followed." Sarah answered

"I always will."

They sat in silence for a long time just watching people as they came and went from the large grassy area.

Sarah finally spoke, "It's happened before."

"What?"

"4 times."

"Sarah, what are you talking about?"

"The baby. I've lost 4 babies now."

"You've never told me this."

"It's hard to talk about."

Sarah wiped her eyes and shifted her body until she was in Chuck's lap, her back leaning against his chest. Chuck wrapped his arms around her middle and kissed the top of her head.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

They sat in silence for a few minutes before Sarah had the courage to speak.

"The first time was with Bryce. We had been together for almost a year when I found out. I never told him, I went to Decker at the time because he was in charge. I was about 3 months along. He told me that because of the contracts I signed they owned me and they needed me. He said I had to either abort the baby in a week or the CIA will terminate it for me. I never went to get an abortion. Decker had his men come and get me a week later. They strapped me to a table and injected ammonia into my womb. It hurt like hell, they injected too much to make sure it was dead. That's why I hate Decker, he does anything to get what he wants."

Sarah wiped more tears from her eyes but it was no use tears still came freely.

"The second time was from a mission. Decker was still in charge at the time and he was not happy with me because of a failed mission. He sent me to go investigate an illegal arms deal inside a human trafficking ring. I was Decker's weapon, his show girl, so he sent me in to be bought by the arms dealer. Things were getting out of hand to I said the code word to Decker who was on the other line. He told me he couldn't do anything so he just sat back and waited for things to play out. I got out almost 5 hours later when Decker pulled me out of the room. I still had blood running down my legs. They had the medical team check up on me. The man had raped me so hard my uterus was pushed back behind my ribcage. I had a procedure to fix it I was sent back in two days later. The next week I found out Decker had six men available during that time to help get me out, he just wanted me to 'complete the mission'. I wanted to quit the CIA, but again I was under contract. It happened two more times before we caught the arms dealer and six weeks later I found out I was pregnant. I didn't know how I was even fertile after that and I didn't know what to do and I was trying to decide but the world ended up deciding for me. I was sent to Bolivia soon after and I was stabbed in the stomach twice. I was assigned to you 3 months later."

Sarah started to cry even harder and so did Chuck. He never knew what his wife had been through and he never imagined it would be anything close to this.

"The third time was a little over two years ago when we were engaged. I was so scared when I found out. We weren't even married and we were still in the CIA. When I finally got the nerve to tell you, you were kidnapped by the man who wanted the intersect. I knew I would do anything to save you. It was in the ring when I was fighting the man to try and find out where you were I-, I took to many blows to the stomach and I felt the blood and I almost lost the fight I was so scared." Sarah choked back tears and looked away.

"Why didn't you ever tell me?"

"I thought you would be mad that I," Sarah choked on her tears "that I sacrificed our child to save you and I couldn't live with you hating me. If I never told you it just made it seem like it never happened."

"I'm not mad Sarah, I'm just happy you're telling me. I love you so much. I knew you were strong Sarah but this is a lot to go through. Please don't keep these things from me, I can help you. Ellie can-"

"No! I don't want anybody knowing, please." Sarah begged as she faced Chuck

Chuck let out a deep breath and slowly nodded his head.

Sarah was still crying so Chuck wiped the tears from her eyes.

"I love you." Chuck whispered

Sarah leaned in and kissed Chuck as she maneuvered herself onto his lap. When they broke the kiss Sarah leaned her forehead against his.

"I love you more than you can ever imagine." Sarah replied before kissing him again 


	20. Chapter 20

Sarah woke up with a start. Her hands were shaking and beads of sweat were dripping from her forehead. Her chest was heaving as she continued to pant. Glancing over at Chuck and finding he was still asleep, Sarah threw the bed sheets off of her body and quietly got out of bed. Sarah didn't bother putting on her robe; she felt too hot. She left the room, being careful not to wake Chuck, and headed for the bathroom. She entered the small room, stood in front of the mirror and bent down towards the sink. Rubbing her hands over her eyes she looked up into the mirror. Turning the faucet on she splashed some water on her face before drying it with a hand towel. Looking back into the mirror, she took her tank top off and brushed her hands over the red scar that would only fade. It would never disappear: a constant reminder of what happened. Sarah looked back into the mirror and shook her head. She frantically put her shirt back on and rushed out of the bathroom. As she walked down the hall she heard Clara start to cry from her bedroom. Knowing Devon that was working the night shift tonight and that Ellie needed her sleep, Sarah walked into the room. Clara was standing up in her crib as her 'big girl' bed was not put together yet. Sarah picked the little one up and held her close. Clara quieted down but still continued to cry. Sarah started to brush Clara's hair out of the way before her hand started to feel wet.

"What the?"

Sarah walked over to the door and flicked the light switch on. Sarah looked at Clara's hair which was covered in puke, her pajamas not looking much better. Sarah peered into the crib seeing the stained bankets. Sarah placed Clara on the dresser before changing her out of her pajamas and her diaper she wore at night as she was being potty trained.

Clara's eyes drifted close before she opened them again. Sarah picked Clara and carried her down the hall to the bathroom farthest away from Ellie, who hadn't slept in days. Placing the little girl on her knee, Sarah turned the knob on the bathtub letting water flow out. Sarah turned the knob until the water was cool enough it would take Clara's temperature down. Sarah placed Clara in the bath and began to scrub the puke out of her hair. Clara could barely keep her eyes open and was having a hard time sitting up. Sarah placed her hand on Clara's back to keep her from falling. After Clara was clean, Sarah lifted her out of the tub and wrapped her in a towel before turning of the light and leaving the bathroom. Clara placed her head on Sarah's shoulder and wrapped her arms around her neck. Sarah checked in on Ellie and Chuck who were both asleep before heading back to Clara's room. Placing Clara down on the dresser, Sarah put Clara in a new diaper and clean pajamas. Sarah picked the toddler up again and walked downstairs to the kitchen before wetting a washcloth with cold water and placing it on Clara's forehead.

"Let's go back to bed." Sarah whispered to Clara

Sarah walked up the stairs into the bedroom while holding Clara. She placed the child down in her crib with a blanket.

Clara struggled to get back up. When she did she stood up and started crying her arms stretched out toward Sarah.

"Clara, you need to sleep." Sarah replied

Clara continued to whine.

Not wanting to wake Ellie up, Sarah grabbed Clara out of her crib and walked back to the guest bedroom with her.

Chuck was dead asleep on the far side of the bed so Sarah climbed in gesturing for Clara to come. Climbing on the bed next to Sarah, Clara laid down next to her aunt, her head on Sarah's chest. Sarah's arm wrapped around Clara and pulled the blankets up. Clara was asleep in minutes and so was Sarah.

The next morning, Chuck wandered into the bathroom, trying- and failing- to keep his eyes closed. Yawning loudly, Chuck finally reached to flip on the light switch and caught a glimpse of Sarah on the bed. She was curled up around Clara, the toddler fast asleep on Sarah's chest. Both of them took a deep breath simultaneously, and Chuck walked over to sit on the edge of the bed, gazing down at his beloved wife. This could've been Finn, Chuck thought.

Two years from now, Finn could have woken up from a nightmare, and Sarah could have comforted him in the middle of the night. She would have sat next to him in bed, dried his tears and calmed his sobs. Then she would have brought him into bed with them, allowing Finn to sleep beside his parents as the night drifted on.

Chuck smiled sadly, fingering a few strands of Sarah's hair. She stirred at his touch, blinking her eyes open. "What?" Sarah asked, gazing up at him.

Chuck shook his head. "Nothing. You'd better get up. We have to leave soon."

"What time does our plane leave?"

"9:15."

Sarah carefully moved the still-sleeping Clara to the middle of the bed and glanced at the clock. "Chuck, it's 8:30! I still have to get ready!"

"Sorry, sorry. I just have to-" Chuck bolted to the bathroom, barely making it to the toilet before he puked up his dinner from the night before.

Sarah leaned forward to see into the bathroom. "Chuck? Are you okay?"

"Yeah I'm-" Chuck started to answer but threw up again.

Sarah got out of bed- careful as to not wake up Clara- and went into the bathroom. She leaned against the doorframe and watched Chuck as he dry-heaved over the toilet. "Chuck-" Sarah sighed as she walked slowly over to him. Helping him up, she proceeded to put her hand on his forehead, checking his temperature. "You're burning up. Are you sure we should leave today?"

"Yeah, I have a meeting tomorrow that I have to be at. I'll be okay."

Sarah began to nod, but heard Clara throw up all over their bed. She rushed back into the other room toward Clara. Holding her hair back, Sarah called for Chuck to bring a towel. Chuck ran into the bedroom at Sarah's command, his arms full with every towel he could find. Tripping over his own feet, he dumped the towels onto Sarah. Sarah glared at him angrily, yanking out the last remaining towel from Chuck's arms. Sarah used the towel to wipe Clara's face then carried her into the bathroom to clean her back up. Sarah called to Chuck, "Hey, would you see if Ellie's awake? If not don't wake her up."

Chuck responded to Sarah's question by yelling across the house. "Ellie?! Are you awake?!"

Ellie marched into the room and slapped Chuck across the face. "I am now."

Chuck clung to his stinging cheek as he walked back into the bathroom, where Sarah was assisting Clara. "She slapped me," he complained.

"Aw, you poor baby," Sarah said sarcastically. She pretended to examine the red mark, then hit him in the same place Ellie had.

"Son of a bi-"

"No!" Ellie snapped as she entered the bathroom, nodding her head in Clara's direction.

"-Bill Clinton." Chuck finished.

Sarah placed Clara in the bath for the second time that night. "What happened?" Ellie asked.

"The baby threw up and so did Clara."

"Hey!" Chuck yelled, but the women ignored him.

Ellie went downstairs to get Pepto Bismal for Clara's stomach.

"I'll be right back."

Clara wailed like a banshee as soon as Ellie left the room, leaving Sarah and Chuck to care for her. Chuck fruitlessly attempted to calm her down, making pathetic shushing noises. Sarah rolled her eyes.

"Screw it," she said, sitting behind Clara in the bathtub, still fully clothed. Clara immediately stopped crying and clung to Sarah. Chuck raised his eyebrows.

"I guess that's one way to solve it."

Sarah sighed. "I had to take a shower anyway. This takes care of both problems."

Ellie walked back into the room, holding a bottle of medicine. "What the he-"

"No!" Chuck said, sarcastically. He pointed emphatically at Clara, accidentally hitting Sarah in the face. "Not in front of the baby!"

"-ck."

Sarah laughed and handed Ellie her dripping daughter. As Sarah stepped out of the tub, she slipped on the wet tile. Chuck caught her in his arms, before turning to the side and throwing up on Sarah.

Ellie wrapped Clara in a towel. "I'll leave you to it." She left the room, singing softly to calm Clara.

Sarah rightened herself on her feet and turned to Chuck. "What time is it?"

Chuck glanced at his watch. "Almost 8:50."

"I'm going to kill you! Chuck, we're going to be late and you puked all over me!"

"Can you shower in 5 minutes?"

"That's like asking Morgan to do a push up."

"Right, well scoot over I need to shower too."

"Uh, no, if you get in here we are gonna be way longer than 5 minutes."

"I'm not feeling good, I just want to take a shower." Chuck clearly stated

"Then go use the shower down the hall." Sarah replied pointing towards the door

30 MINUTES LATER

"You know we missed our flight by now Sarah, you need to hurry."

"I'm fine and we haven't missed it. You got the time wrong it's at 10:15, I just checked."

"Awesome."

"I heard my name!" Devon said as he barged into the room.

"Ah!" Chuck squealed trying to cover his chest

"Yes, Chuck, cover your boobs." Sarah stated sarcastically

Devon looked around.

"Oh whoops, sorry Sarah." Devon said as he quickly left the room

"Why didn't he say sorry to me?" Chuck asked

"Because you are pratically dressed, Chuck!"

"Whatever." Chuck mumbled

"Have you seen my black top?"

"Sarah you have like 23 black tops."

Sarah glared at him, "Do you really want to play that game right now."

"Is that Ellie calling me?" Chuck said as he looked around and then looked at Sarah. "I better go see what she wants."

Sarah rolled her eyes as Chuck rushed out of the room. She finished getting dress before she suddenly felt nauseous as well.

Sarah leaned against the wall and closed her eyes trying to the relieve the nauseous feeling.

It didn't work.

"Sarah, are you okay?" Ellie said as she walked into the room

"Yah, I just threw up as well."

"You sure you guys don't want to stay an extra day?"

"Yah, I think it's food poisoning from that pie Chuck made last night, plus we have a really important meeting tomorrow that we cannot miss."

"I'm so glad I didn't have that pie."

ON THE PLANE

"Chuck this is the most ghetto plane ever." Sarah said

"Yah, but on the bright side the tickets were really cheap."

"My seatbelt is practically duct taped together!"

"On the bright side, you have a seatbelt."

"Chuck there is a guy holding a chicken behind us."

"It's a rooster."

"This is going to be a long flight."


	21. Chapter 21

2 weeks later

"Sarah, you really need to go see a doctor." Chuck said

"I'm fine, Chuck!" Sarah replied wiping her mouth with a towel

"You've been throwing up for almost 3 weeks now, I have already gotten better and so has Clara. Please, go see a doctor to make sure it really is food poisoning." Chuck pleaded

"Why are so insistent on this, I have been able to function just fine?" Sarah asked

"Because I care about you and I want you to get better."

"I'll be fine Chuck!"

"Please, just go to the Insta care to be sure!"

"Fine, I'll go just so you will shut up!"

"Perfect! Everyone wins!"

"Wipe that smirk off your face and get ready, Morgan is coming over in a bit to practice for your stupid dance."

"Hey the Chorgan annual Christmas dance is not stupid!"

"Chorgan?"

"Yah, Chuck and Morgan combined."

"Remind me why I married you?"

"Cause I'm adorable." Chuck said with a goofy grin on his face

"That you are." Sarah said as she kissed him

"You know what I love about this place?" Chuck asked

"Mmm?" Sarah replied as she continued to kiss him again

"No Morgan door." Chuck replied as they fell onto the bed

"I love you so much."

"Hey do you guys have bagels?" Morgan asked as he barged into the room

Sarah rolled onto her back in defeat.

"Did I interrupt something?" Morgan asked clueless

Sarah got up and grabbed her bag.

"Where are you going?" Chuck asked

"The doctor, or else I just might kill morgan!" Sarah said as she shoved passed Morgan

"What did I miss?" Morgan asked

Sarah sat in silence after her doctors appointment staring at the sonogram picture. 14 weeks. She was 14 weeks pregnant.

"It's not possible." She whispered to herself

She knew something was up that she didn't have the regular stomach flu. Her body was acting up and she felt bloated constantly. She thought maybe she had mono or something. Being pregnant was the last thing she expected.

"It's not possible." She cried

there is always a chance you can have children, it's just low; but, not impossible... miracles happen everyday.

The doctors words rang in Sarah's head.

"But I can still lose the baby." Sarah said, "I can't do this. Not again."

"Put your leg over my head!" Chuck yelled at Morgan

"Its not long enough!" Morgan yelled back, "Hah, that's what she said."

Chuck dropped Morgan.

"You are so immature!" Chuck yelled

"We are wearing yellow tights!"

"We're elves." Chuck pointed out

"We're elves!" Morgan mimicked

Chuck jumped on Morgan tackling him to the ground. The two boys wrestled before Sarah walked into the house seeing Chuck pinning Morgan to the ground.

"You know when you said, Christmas Dance, I did not think this is what you meant." Sarah teased as she set her purse down.

"Quiet Woman! We are settling this like men!" Morgan yelled

Sarah glared at Morgan causing him to back down.

"In yellow tights." Sarah said

"We're elves!" They yelled at the same time.

Sarah sat in her room battling with her own mind.

Why did this have to happen?

Is it going to happen?

What is Chuck gonna say?

How am I going to tell him?

Will I tell him?

I have to tell him!

Why do I have to tell him?

This isn't going to happen

"Chuck, can we talk?" Sarah asked as took Chuck' s hand.

"Of course." Chuck replied as he placed a hand on the small of her back and led her to the far side of the living room. "What's wrong?"

"Its nothing really, I just-

"Chuck, Casey just sent me a text. We just got a lead on our guy he wants us down at the office pronto." Morgan interrupted

"Hold on." Chuck said to Morgan, "Sarah what did you want to talk about?"

"It's nothing important. It can wait. We should get going." Sarah responded

"You sure?" Chuck asked

"I promise." Sarah reassured him

"Ok lovebirds we got to go. It's gonna be a long night. So let's get going. I have cheese-its!" Morgan interrupted while opening the door

"I'll meet you in the car, I'm gonna grab a glass of water." Sarah said while entering the kitchen

"Alright. Hurry." Chuck stated as he left and closed the door behind him.

Sarah leaned up against the edge of the counter and reached into her pocket. She pulled out the small ultrasound picture she received just days prior.

Its not even going to happen. I'm just going to lose it.

With soft tears falling from her eyes she tore the picture in half and put if back in her pocket.

He doesn't need to know. It'll be better not to get his hopes up. It's better that way.

With that Sarah left the house to get in the car.

Sarah leaned up against the window at the office absent mindlessly drinking coffee. They had been here for hours now and the time was almost 4 am. Sarah was exhausted. She didn't feel good at all and she had a migraine. The guys were sitting around the computer finding more Intel on their target.

"Sarah get over here we've got some new info on this guy." Casey commanded

Sarah put her coffee down and got up rubbing her head.

"What?" Sarah asked

"It seems this guy used to work for the CIA. He then went rogue after he killed his handlers. He went on a killing spree for a while, sold some illegal weapons and then killed his old partner and his entire family with an axe, wife and kids included."

"There's pictures." Chuck said as he pointed to the computer screen, "they might help us."

Casey clicked on the file and scrolled through the pictures of the mass murder of the family.

Sarah felt like she was going to puke. She had seen dead people before but never kids who were brutally murdered.

"This is horrible, why are we going after this guy?" Morgan said looking away from the screen

"He is now a cyber terrorist." Chuck replied, "and a really good one."

Casey continued to scroll through pictures looking for any clues that would help them. When the photos of the children's bodies came up, Sarah couldn't take it anymore.

She got up and left the office room and leaned against the wall in the hallway around the corner. Taking the ripped ultrasound picture out of her pocket she held it tightly to her chest while she blinked tears away.

"I'll go get her." Chuck sighed

"I think you should probably give her some space." Casey said

"No, I'm her husband I'm supposed to be by her side at all times." Chuck sternly replied

"Chuck, I think Casey's right. You're kind of overwhelming." Morgan butted in

"I am not!" Chuck argued

"Here, why don't I go talk to her." Morgan stated

"Uh, I don't know-" Casey started

"Trust me on this one." Morgan said as he left

"This is not going to end well." Casey sighed

"Does he not understand that whatever he makes worse, I have to fix!" Chuck yelled in frustration

"Hey sarah." Morgan said as he sat down across from Sarah in the small hallway

"You are the last person I expected." Sarah laughed while wiping a stray tear

"Look, I'm sorry about the pictures, Casey can be so heartless."

"I'm alright." Sarah lied

"What do you have there?" Morgan asked gesturing to the torn photo Sarah had tightly in her hand.

"Where's Chuck?" Sarah asked avoiding the question

"Sarah, whats the photo?"

"It's nothing you need to be worried about."

"Is it serious?"

"It's nothing!"

"Sarah, hand over the photo, come on I can keep a secret."

"No."

"Then I will go tell Chuck you have a photo that you are hiding from him."

Morgan started to stand up before Sarah grabbed his arm. Morgan stared down at her and saw that her eyes were glistening with tears.

"Please do not tell him." Sarah whispered

Morgan sat down quietly and reached out for the photo as Sarah placed it into his palm face down. Morgan flipped the photo over and stared at it for a bit.

"Why are you sad about this Sarah? This is great, you're pregnant again!"

"No, it's not great Morgan when we lost Finn the- the doctor told me it's almost impossible for me to get pregnant."

"Well then this is great, your pregnant, it's like a miracle! So why are you sad?"

Sarah took in a deep breath, "He also said that if I did get pregnant, I wouldn't be able to carry a baby full term."

"Oh." Morgan replied his face covered in sadness

"This is silly, why am I talking to you! You're Morgan for heaven sakes."

Sarah ripped the photo from his hands and stood up quickly. Morgan quickly grabbed her wrist before she could walk away.

"Hey, I know I'm not like a therapist or someone to go to in times of need. I'm a goofball and an idiot, but once in a blue moon I can be ok with listening and giving advice. Please tell Chuck Sarah he needs to-"

"No he doesn't he will just get his hopes up!"

"He's your husband Sarah! That's his child too, he deserves to know."

"And if I lose the baby?"

"Then you lose the baby together. Marriage is about working through hard times together, not alone. Please, I'm begging you to tell him. If not going to say a word to anyone even if you don't tell him, but please he will be heartbroken if you don't."

Chuck and Sarah got home at 6:00 in the morning both exhausted and worn out.

"What did the doctor say by the way?" Chuck asked as he suppressed a yawn

Sarah froze, "he uh, said it was just a bad bug and said I would have to wait it out."

"Ugh, how long?"

"Uh, could be a while." Sarah stuttered

"I'm sorry if there is anything I can do for you just let me know."

"Thanks." Sarah said as she kissed him.

"Let's hop in the shower before we go to bed, we both need to be refreshed."

"No!" Sarah yelled before calming her voice, "I don't want to get you sick, doctor said I could be contagious, I just want to wait till this is over before-"

"No, that's okay Sarah, don't worry." Chuck rubbed her shoulders in a calming motion, "Why are you tense?"

"Long day I guess."

"You use that bathroom, I will use the guest bath."

"You sure?"

"Of course." Chuck said as he kissed her forehead

Sarah stepped out of the shower and stood in front of the mirror. Rubbing her hands over her stomach, she took a deep breath. There was a small baby bump there, not too big but definitely noticeable without clothes on.

"How am I supposed to hide this?" Sarah asked herself

CHRISTMAS

16 WEEKS GESTATION

It was Christmas and Sarah's morning sickness had finally begun to calm down. Chuck had noticed the slight swell of her stomach a couple weeks ago but he believed Sarah when she said the doctor said she might be bloated. They hadn't seen each other in 2 weeks since Chuck went on a guy vacation with Morgan to Disneyland.

"Okay open It!" Chuck exclaimed as he handed his last present over to Sarah

Sarah unwrapped the red paper and opened the box. She unfolded the tissue paper covering it and pulled out a pair of men's swim trunks that were covered in mini versions of Barack Obama's face.

"Uh, Chuck, as much as I love you, what is this?" Sarahv asked

"I must have switched the labels on you and Morgan's gift." He replied

"So what does Morgan have?" She asked hesitantly

"Shhhhoooottt!" Chuck yelled

Chuck jumped out of his seat and grabbed his car keys. Sarah got up and followed him.

"What are you doing?"

"Put a robe on, hurry, we have got to get to Morgan's before he opens that gift!"

"Chuck you're scaring me." Sarah teased

"Hurry!"

Morgan's house

"Dad you came!" Alex squealed as she hugged her father

Casey replied with a half smile as he patted his daughter's back.

"Wasssuuppp my soon to be father in law!"

Casey grunted and shoved passed Morgan. Heading over to Alex.

"I'm going to head to go take a shower, dad there is vodka in the cabinet down the hall."

"I'm going to open Chucks gift." Morgan exclaimed

Morgan unwrapped the red paper covering a cardboard box before looking inside.

"Sweet, just my size!"

Chuck and Sarah both hopped out of the car and barged into Morgan's house.

Looking around, their eyes landed on Morgan who was standing in the kitchen wearing sheer white lingerie and was stuffing mangos in the upper part of the clothing.

"Oh, Chuck! Hey buddy, thanks for the gift! It's fits pretty well, except I might have to start taking some estrogen to fill out the bra. And you could have gotten the thong maybe half a size up, it's a little small in some areas, if you know what I mean." Morgan stated as he shook his hips

"Merry Christmas Sarah!" Chuck said sarcastically

"I'm not wearing that." Sardah said bluntly

As one of the mangos fell out Casey walked into the room glancing at Morgan before letting out a grunt and taking a shot of vodka.

"Are you serious?" Chuck stated, "do you really think that is your gift?"

"Why wouldn't it be?" Morgan asked sincerely

"Take it off!" Chuck said

Morgan then proceeded to slide the underwear down and toss it to Sarah.

"No not here!" Chuck yelled

"I'm gonna kill him." Sarah said as she back away from the underwear

Casey just let out a grunt

"I'm leaving, goodbye." Sarah turned on her heals and walked out the door

"Wait, Morgan, do you have the other thing that came with it?" Chuck asked

"What other thing?"

"The, the the-"

"Oh, yah!" Morgan said as he picked up a bottle and tried to read it. "Looo baay! Is it French?"

Chuck sighed and left the house.

"Mmm, it's strawberry flavored."

Casey took another shot of Vodka.

CHUCK AND SARAH'S HOUSE

"Alright, you ready for your last gift?" Sarah asked Chuck

"There isn't any more presents under the tree."

"This one is not under the tree."

"I like where this is going."

"Stay there!"

Sarah left the room and walked down the hall to the bedroom in a seductive manner. She came back out of the room holding a small box wrapped in green wrapping paper.

"Open it." Sarah commanded

Chuck unwrapped the paper and untied the bow before opening the box. Reaching his hand inside he pulled out a small ultrasound picture that was taped down the middle to keep the two halves together.

Chuck stated at the picture confused thinking it was Finn for a moment or maybe even Ellie's baby for some reason.

"Look at the date." Sarah whispered

Chuck glanced down at the picture for a second before looking back up at Sarah who bad raised her shirt up and had her hands placed on her abdomen.

"What?" Chuck said dumbfounded, tears streaming down his face

Sarah scooted closer to Chuck and placed his hands on top of hers. Chuck's eyes moved toward Sarah's stomach where his hands were placed and then looked back into her eyes which were also filled with tears. He repeated the routine for a couple more times before Sarah placed her hands on his face and kissed him.

"I'm pregnant." She whispered as there foreheads touch after the kiss

Chuck kissed her this time. His hands snaked around her waist pulling her flush against him as she ran her hands through his hair.

Breaking the kiss, Chuck asked, "What! How is this possible? The doctor said the odds of you getting pregnant were less than one percent."

"That's what we are about aren't we? Beating the odds."

Sarah pulled him against her once again continuing to kiss him passionately. Her hands were on his chest while his were under her shirt rubbing up and down her back.

"Beating the odds." Chuck whispered against her lips as he gently laid her down on the couch.


	22. Chapter 22

AN: Sorry we haven't updated in so long. For that you get a super long chapter! Summer if finally here so this book should get a lot of updates! 

THE NEXT DAY

It was about six in the morning before Chuck finally gave up on trying to sleep and grabbed his laptop instead and began working on some stuff for Carmichael industries. Chuck looked over at Sarah who was turned towards him. Her head was lying on the pillow while her hand rested over her stomach.

Chuck brushed her hair out of her face and tucked it behind her ear. He put his left hand on top of Sarah's and kept it there while he continued working. While writing up some new cases and dealing with the final funds for the company he noticed Ellie was trying to skype him. Clicking answer, he switched over the screen so he could talk to Ellie.

"Hey, Elle what's up? Chuck whispered, "Try to be quiet Sarah is sleeping next to me."

Chuck turned the laptop toward Sarah so Ellie could see.

"Nothing I was just got done with a video conference with another doctor for a big meeting coming up and noticed you were on. Is everything okay? Why aren't you sleeping?" Ellie questioned

"No, I'm fine. I just woke up and couldn't fall back asleep. Sarah's exhausted though." Chuck replied

"How is Sarah?"

"She's doing good, everything seems to be well and she was cleared for intense exercise in two weeks if she wants."

"That's good, I bet she's happy."

"She isn't getting back to it yet. She can get sore pretty easily, she still has to be pretty gentle with somethings unless she suffers through the pain. She says it's not too bad though. It's just uncomfortable. The doctor says that's fine though. Nothing will be damaged. She does need to be careful right now though. If she does anything that is too rough on her body, she could start hemorrhaging."

"That's still good news. How are her memories coming. I know the last time I asked she had most of her memories back."

"She is doing okay. Not much progress in memories though. She doesn't really remember some missions. The biggest is our wedding and Shaw. Also everything that happened when Quinn had her. I'm just worried, when she remembers the emotions and pain from that event come with. Her time with Quinn is uncounted for, I don't want her to be in pain. But, we have been going to a neurologist once a month to get her brain scanned and everything seems normal. Beckman ordered it and got the best CIA neurologist they have."

"What about that intersect that is still in your head?"

"So far nothing has gone wrong, the intersect is perfect and so is my brain. They are keeping it in there until they build a new one."

"Then why aren't you on missions? Don't they own you because of the intersect?"

"I don't think many people know besides those who have worked on the 'Bartowski Case.' I'm able to turn this one on and off when I want so I haven't flashed on anything; but, yes they could call me in to do field work, but Beckman has been respecting my wishes so far. She said she would only contact in an extreme emergency. Which could be next week."

"When did you figure out how to turn it off?"

Chuck turned to Sarah to make sure she was still asleep.

"It was when I started to flash on Sarah. She hasn't yet told me her whole past. She has tried but she can't bring herself to do it and I won't push her. I got to know a couple of things but I turned it off when it started showing me her CIA training. I'm not sure I want to see everything they did to my wife because I know it isn't good."

"Does Sarah know this?"

"No, I haven't told her yet."

"Told me what?" Sarah asked groggily as she started to wake up.

Chuck put his arm up so she could rest her head on his chest. His arm then wrapped back around her. Sarah pulled the covers up to her chest to cover herself and to warm herself up.

"I'll tell you in a bit." Chucks said as he kissed the top of her head. "Do you wan't me to grab you a t-shirt?"

Sarah nodded as her eyes closed again.

"Be right back Elle."

Chuck handed the laptop over to Sarah and climbed out of bed.

"Fun night, huh?" Ellie teased

Sarah laughed and rubbed her eyes and sat up in bed the blanket still wrapped around her body.

"How are you?" Sarah asked as she suppressed a yawn

"I'm doing good."

"How's the baby?"

"He's doing good, just kicking a lot and can't wait to come out."

"Here." Chuck said as he handed Sarah the shirt and grabbed the laptop so Sarah could change.

Sarah scooted over and pulled Chuck's shirt over her head before scooting back to cuddle back with Chuck and talk to Ellie.

"How many more weeks?" Chuck asked

"It's about five but the doctor says I'm going to go into labor early most likely."

"Are you efaced at all?" Sarah asked

"Just a little bit, but I'm not an OB, that's her job."

Chuck and Sarah both laughed at that.

"I'm going to go get some pop tarts, you want any?" Chuck asked

"Yah, toast them though." Sarah yelled

"I always do!" chuck shouted back from the kitchen

After Chuck left the room Ellie spoke up.

"How are you doing with all of this and don't say you're fine Sarah. This has to be hard for you Sarah. You just lost a baby and I'm having one and I just feel so bad."

"Ellie don't feel bad. You don't have to restrain your happiness to spare my feelings. My baby died and I have come to terms with that. The drunk driver was sent to prison for what he did. I know that my chance of becoming a mother was practically taken from me because of the choices I made. I know this, Ellie. It's hard everyday but it's getting better. Please don't feel like I despise you and this baby because mine was taken away. Please don't."

"Okay." Ellie simply responded

"I have some good news anyway." Sarah hesitated, "Just promise not to tell anyone. Please."

"I promise."

"Well, since the C-section, I have been healing pretty well and things have been progressing better than expected. I'm sure Chuck told you."

Ellie nodded

"I, uh... I'm pregnant."

Ellie sat there speechless for a moment before speaking up.

"What how?"

Sarah shrugged her shoulders and shook her head as she wiped the tears off her face.

"That's amazing Sarah! Are you excited?"

Sarah nodded her head as she continued to cry. The reality of the whole thing finally set in. She was going to be a mom. She's pregnant again. There truly was a little miracle inside of her.

"I'm so, so happy, Elle. I've never been happier. I thought that... that after Finn died we could just try again but then the doctor said something about not being able to have kids and... I don't even remember the rest I was so in shock, confused. I was just so worried I was going to dissapoint Chuck. We were so close to our happily ever after and then we didn't get it and I know Chuck wouldn't be mad at me but I could never get rid of the feeling that this was my fault and now I have the chance to fulfill his dream, our dream."

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

3 Hours Later

Sarah and Chuck were both fast asleep again. Sarah's back was pressed against his chest while his arm draped over her stomach.

At about 7am, Sarah threw Chuck's arm off of her and darted toward the bathroom. Chuck got up too and walked to the bathroom to see Sarah heaving over the toilet.

Chuck came over and rubbed her back while reaching toward the counter to grab a hair elastic. He pulled her hair back into a messy bun and continued to rub circles on her back.

When Sarah was done she flushed the toilet and fell back toward Chuck her chest rising up and down rapidly. Chuck reached for a rag and handed it to Sarah so she could wash her face.

She layed against his back for a bit more so she could rest her eyes. One of Chuck's hands rested on her thigh while the other stroked her hair on her head.

"You doing okay?" Chuck asked

"I'm better now, I just feel weak." Sarah replied

Chuck helped her up while he stood up.

"I'm going to make you some herbal tea." Chuck said as he left

Sarah walked over to the sink and started to brush her teeth and wash her face. Chuck walked into the bedroom and set the tea down on the side table.

"Sarah, you want some more clothes than just the t-shirt you're wearing?"

"Yes please." She called

Sarah walked out of the bathroom with her arms folded across her chest. Chuck came over and handed her clothes to her.

"Here yah go. We've got your favorite booty shorts and the most comfortable pair of panties I could find."

"Did you try them on?" Sarah teased

"Are you kidding, those would not fit over my thunder thighs."

"I love you." Sarah said as she leaned up to kiss him.

Chuck the broke the kiss and placed his hand on her hips.

"As sexy as you look in _onl_ y my shirt, and how much I want to continue, I made you tea. So sit down and I will be right back."

Sarah got dressed and sat down on the bed to drink her tea. Chuck came back into the bedroom with a hairbrush and hair elastics.

"Here let me sit behind you." Chuck said

Sarah laughed as she scooted forward so Chuck could sit behind her. She crossed her legs and shifter her tea into one hand so she could brush her hair back with the other. Chuck sat behind her and gathered her hair with his hands.

"What's all this about?" Sarah asked with a smile

"See, when Ellie and I were growing up and our mom left, Ellie had no girls around at all. My dad wasn't really even there either, as you know. Ellie had friends at school, but none of them were really close. That's why she was so happy when we got married because she finally had a sister. Before that it was just her and me and we were super close. When girl things came up I was the only one there for her. Her first ballet recital was a mess. She was so sad because dad couldn't figure out how to do a bun. She quit ballet and joined soccer so she could just wear her hair in a ponytail. When she got into junior high it was the worst. Our dad was even more distant at that point. I tried to talk to her but she was so afraid or something. All of her friends had started shaving their legs, liking boys and they all had such cute hair that she wanted. When she started her period she locked herself in her room for a week. I barely even knew what it was. My dad tried to explain, and that didn't work, so I asked my 5th grade teacher. That was a fun conversation."

Sarah laughed and shifted in her seat. Chuck continued to brush her hair.

"Our dad was locked in his office like always and told us not to bother him. So, I took my piggy bank and walked all 9 miles to our local pharmacy and bought every kind of tampon and pad in the place. I also bought three bottles of Advil as well and a candy bar. I spent every penny I had. I came home and when I got into her room, I offered to do her laundry and that was a mistake. I thought she had murdered the neighbors cat. I kind of hoped she did. That thing was evil. Between that, the CIA, and you, I have become an expert at washing blood out of things."

"You're cute, but I think I'm more experienced then you." Sarah laughed

Chuck kissed her head and started to braid her hair.

"When it came to her first school dance she had no one to do her hair. She could do a French braid and a ponytail and all of her friends were going to have 'prom hairstyles' in her opinion. So I thought I would be a good brother and I learned how to do some dance hairstyles. Morgan had long hair at the time, so I practiced on him. I did her hair for the dance and it was actually pretty good. The magazines I looked at paid off. It was in some kind of braided low bun with curls on the side. We have a picture of it buried somewhere, of her hair, not Morgan's. So that is my stupid secret talent. I can braid hair pretty good."

Chuck finished off her hair with an elastic.

"That's not stupid. It's actually adorable." Sarah said as she turned around

"Every man's dream. To have a hidden talent that's adorable." Chuck teased

"Well think of it this way." Sarah sat her tea down on the table and turned around to face Chuck. She grabbed his hand and placed it on her stomach. "If this little baby is a girl she is going to be so happy that her daddy can do her hair. She will have the cutest hair in the entire first grade. Plus, she might be a little less embarrassed when she starts her period. My dad was horrible at that. And I can't do little girl hair, so I'm glad you can."

"That does make me feel better. Speaking of which, when do we find out the sex?" Chuck asked

"Today at 4:00. We have an appointment with my OB." Sarah responded

"What do think it will be?"

"A girl. What about you."

"I honestly have no clue. Hey, do want a gender reveal?"

"Just a cute picture saying it. We can send it to family and friends. I don't want to plan a party."

"Good thinking."

Sarah couldn't take it any more. She was going crazy. She pushed herself against Chuck and captures his mouth with hers. Chuck pulled her flush against him.

"I forgot how much I love this side effect of pregnancy."

Sarah grabbed Chuck's shirt and pulled it over his head before throwing on the floor. Chuck leaned into Sarah's neck and started kissing the spot just below her ear making her moan.

"I need you... now." Sarah whispered

Chuck started to lift his t shirt off of Sarah before a coughing from the tv monitor interrupted them.

Sarah squeezed her eyes shut hoping that the person on the tv was not who she thought it was.

"Beckman..." Chuck said in an embarrassed tone

Sarah got off of Chuck and sat on his right side, the blankets pulled up to her chest.

"Beckman, no offence, but we don't work for you anymore." Chuck stated

"You still have that Intersect in your head so technically, you do." Beckman replied

"Why haven't you contacted us before?" Sarah asked

"Sarah was still getting through her memory loss. Plus, the world has been unusually peaceful."

"But you know we don't want to work for the CIA anymore." Sarah said

"I don't care, this is a matter of national security." Beckman yelled

"You can't just send us back into the field!" Sarah yelled back

"Okay! Let's calm down." Chuck interrupted, "What do you need?"

"We have an Armenian smuggler who has been acting as a mole in the Chinese embassy. He is selling secrets and lies to China from Poland and the US. He is dangerous and needs to be stopped to prevent us from going to war with China and starting World War three. He's meeting with Lai Chan, head of a trafficking company. They have a meeting soon. Your job is to infiltrate his warehouse and extract the Armenian using any means necessary. You are not going into the field unless necassary. Only I know that you have the intersect. If the president found out you would be back in the field. It just looks like we are hiring Carmichael Industries and you will do it with a small payment. You need to hack into his system while our guys take him out. Extract anything suspicious. Casey will be in the field and Sarah if necessary."

"General, why do you need Sarah?" Chuck asked

"She signed a contract. As long as you're in the CIA she is with you." The general replied

"What contract?" Chuck asked, "I haven't heard of this contract!"

"Chuck, please-" Sarah pleaded with him

Chuck turned toward the monitor and started to talk, "General, I'm sorry, but Sa-"

"We'll do it!" Sarah interrupted

"Good, I expect you in Bejing at noon tomorrow." Beckman said as she turned off the monitor.

"Sarah, you're pregnant! You cannot go into the field!"

"Did you not hear her Chuck, we work for the CIA still, they own us! They have the right to terminate the pregnancy."

"And that's another thing! Why do they own _you_? What the hell is this contract!?" Chuck yelled

"Beckman suggested it after we got married. I knew that they might force you into the agency if you had the intersect or they needed you to help with the programming and I wanted to be there."

"Why would you want to be there Sarah?! What if we had kids when they dragged me back in, why would you want to abandon them!? Plus, you're pregnant Sarah! Why would you sign this contract when you know I would have disagreed!"

"Because I couldn't lose you!" Sarah yelled back,  
"I can't lose you..." She said as her voice started to break

"Sarah, please don't put our baby's life in danger. Don't put your life in danger. You know what could happen. If even one thing goes wrong you could start hemorrhaging."

"Chuck everything has healed. My risk is not that high."

"30% more than the average woman is pretty high Sarah. You know you will be in a lot of pain if you get hurt below your chest. What if I can't get to you, or Casey can't. If you start bleeding you can't stop it yourself. This is not worth the risk, Sarah!"

"If I don't go the CIA will just kill the baby. You and I both know that."

"Sarah, Beckman wouldn't do that."

"It's not her call. The CIA has done it before they will do it again."

"You could hurt the baby Sarah, this is already a risky pregnancy."

"I'm staying with you. It will be safe. I'll run the monitors while Casey goes out into the field."

"And if they need you?"

"Then I have to go. They will know something is up if I don't. I can't risk that, we can't risk that. Plus, I am not risking you getting put in a bunker for the rest of your life."

"But you'll risk the baby's life." Chuck pleaded as he grabbed her hands"Sarah, please."

Chuck held her hands and looked into her eyes that were avoiding his. Sarah turned to face him, a look of hurt on her face. Chuck went to wrap his arms around her but she pushed his hands from her torso and backed away. Her hand came up to wipe the tears off her face, but she slapped his hand and shook her head.

"Sarah-"

"Not now!" Sarah whispered as she left the bedroom

"Sarah, please eat something." Chuck pleaded with her

"I ate before we left, plus I'm not hungry." She replied

"Sarah just eat some strawberries so the moron will shut up." Casey said

Sarah got up and grabbed the strawberries and brought them back to her seat.

"Oh, so you listen to him." Chuck said sounding annoyed

"You know what Chuck!" Sarah started as she stood up

Morgan rushed over and stood between the two.

"How about we just breathe..." Morgan stated

Sarah stepped backwards allowing Chuck to have some room.

"I'm going to the bathroom." Sarah said bluntly before leaving

Morgan went back to his seat and started to look for his bag.

"Chuck where did you put my bag?" He asked

"Your purse is by your suitcase." Casey grunted

Morgan got up and headed out of the compartment to get his bag. While Morgan was walking back he saw Sarah sitting in a seat near the back.

"Hey, scoot over." Morgan said to Sarah

"Morgan-" Sarah warned

"Scooch!" He said again

Sarah scooted a seat over to allow Morgan to sit.

"Why are you on this mission? You're pregnant."

"I know, but the CIA doesn't know that, I dont... I don't want them to hurt the baby."

"Beckman wouldn't do that, would she?"

"You don't know the CIA like I do Morgan, they don't care about a baby, it will slow them down. The less they know, the better. She might be ordered to terminate the pregnancy if she finds out, I'm CIA property, I'm not worth anything to them, if it comes down to it, they will spare no expense in killing me, my body doesn't belong to me."

4 HOURS LATER

Chuck walked over to where Sarah was. She was sound asleep on the couch at the front of the plain. Her golden hair was sprawled on her back with a few strands laying on her face. Her hand was under the pillow that her head rested on while the other was gently placed on her stomach. Chuck had placed a blanket on her as soon as he noticed. Although he didn't agree with the whole 'hiding the pregnancy' thing, he was going to respect his wife's wishes.

Chuck brushed some hair out of her face and lightly stroked her cheek until her eyes slowly opened. Sarah sat up and leaned against the arm of the couch.

"Hey, we landed about two hours ago. Beckman just finished briefing us on the mission. I let you sleep, and don't fight me on it. Beckman was completely fine. You haven't had sleep in a few days anyway. That's not good for you, either of you." Chuck finished as he placed his hand on her stomach

"Where's Casey?" Sarah asked

"He's out with Morgan getting our surveillance van."

"What's our mission?"

"His name is Narek Papazian, Morgan calls him Papa. He's in Beijing for an exchange meeting. We don't know what though. The government has reason to believe it is for nuclear weapons, specifically more efficient designs. The guy he is trading with owns a large portion of a worldwide human/drug trafficking ring. Both of them are meeting there tonight for a big auction. It's in a private building, big place, lots of security. I'm in charge of hacking the security system while you and Casey track surveillance and guide Morgan. New Plan, we are getting into the warehouse, Beckman has men on the inside and outside for extraction. Morgan is acting as a potential buyer. Once the security is hacked and Papazian is in a private room with whomever he bought, Casey will infiltrate the situation, get Papazian, and rescue the girl. Beckman wants him returned dead or alive. We are told not to go after anyone else. Papzian is our link, if we get him, we get everything. The security system is insane. Lots of protection. This mission will take a while. I packed you a bag."

"Wait a minute. You're sending Morgan into a highly dangerous situation where he acts as potential buyer for a prostitute?"

"Yes."

"And Alex is okay with this?"

"She doesn't exactly know, she is away visiting her mom. She thinks we are at some CIA conference."

"Are you sure Morgan can do this?"

"Yah, he'll be fine. We better get going, I got your coat. It's really cold outside. Our bags are ready. Oh, and you're wearing this mask."

"Chuck I'm not wearing that, I'm not sick."

"I know, I'm wearing one too and so is Morgan. Casey refused and threw it at me. The air quality is horrid. Technically Morgan and I don't need it, but you're pregnant. I'm just making it look like I'm paranoid. We also have a humidifier in the van."

"Chuck-"

"I just want you safe. You and the baby. I understand if you don't want to say anything to Beckman, but I'm going to protect you as much as possible. Please, just let me."

Sarah sighed and got up from the couch, "Okay."

IN THE VAN

"Alright Morgan don't screw this up." Casey grunted as he put Morgan's earpiece on him

"You'll do great Morgan, it's just like the movie Taken, act like the bad guys." Chuck said as he placed both hands on Morgan's shoulders

"But I want to be Liam Neeson." Morgan Whined

"Take this." Casey said

"Woah, I don't want a gun!" Morgan yelled

"It's a tranq gun, numb nuts. Why would I trust you bullets?"

"We've got to send him in, the show starts in 20." Sarah said as she walked up to them

"Good luck man." Chuck said as he opened the door, "Act tough!"

"Okay, let's get started." Sarah stated

Chuck went and sat down in his chair in front of all the monitors and got to work hacking into the security system. Sarah sat down next to Casey and waited for Chuck to get into the surveillance so they could monitor the building. After about 20 minutes the video came up on the screen. Sarah started to find Morgan and tell him what to do, while Casey surveyed the building and spotted any potential hazards.

"Are you doing alright Morgan?" Sarah asked

"Yah, everything is fine so far. I've spotted our guy. He's on my three o'clock." Morgan replied

"I've got him. Have they started yet?"

"No, they will in about two minutes. What do I do?"

"Just act interested in some and not in others. You can bid, but do NOT buy. We need you to stay in there. Got it?"

"Yup."

"We've got lots of guards. Only about half of them are our guys. We're patrolling the south hallway and the main upper hallway. We've got a couple on the side doors and the back door as well." Casey interrupted

"Chuck, how's it coming?" Sarah asked

"These guys are good, I don't have surveillance to private rooms yet. I've got control of the lighting though and the air conditioning. Alarm system and the locks are a little tougher though."

40 MINUTES LATER

"Guys, we got a problem." Morgan said over the intercom

"What?" Casey asked

"Our papa guy isn't interested in anything, he seems to want to leave."

"Why?" Sarah asked

"He's just not interested, he hasn't made a single bid and there has been some pretty erotic shows going on." Morgan replied

"Is he gay?" Chuck asked while eating a granola bar

"Uh, I don't think so, we've had a few guys out here too and he seem repulsed by that."

"Alright, Walker, you're going in." Casey stated

"What!" Chuck yelled as he turned to face Casey, "Beckman said she won't be in the field."

"Unless needed, well guess what nerd, she's needed." Casey argued

"But-"

"Chuck! It's fine." Sarah vocalized as she gave him a 'shut up now, or else' stare

"Good, go throw a skimpy number on and get him to buy you, we'll handle it from there." Casey retorted

"But I don't have access to the private rooms yet!" Chuck said

"Then you better get them." Casey grunted, "Stop being jealous and suck it up."

"Chuck come on." Sarah said as she gestured toward the bathroom at the back of the van

They opened the door to bathroom and crammed themselves into to the small space as Sarah began to change.

"Sarah, this is not okay."

"I'll be fine Chuck, it's just a seduction, nothing is going to happen to me."

"Sarah, it's dangerous!"

"I'll be fine, we'll be fine."

Sarah grabbed Chuck's hand and placed it on her lower abdomen.

"Won't he notice this?"

"I'm barely showing, the only reason you recognized it is because you know me, he doesn't."

"What about the scar?"

"Its really far down, he'll only see it if he gets me out of my pants. I'll make something up. Look, it's not hard Chuck. I get him to buy me, we go into the room and I hold off getting into bed until we can get him."

"What if you can't hold off. I'm going to bet this guy isn't gentle Sarah. He WILL hurt you."

"I won't let that happen and I know you won't either. Yes he is going to be rough, but the baby will be fine. I've done this a lot. I know what I'm doing."

"What about that one time where they couldn't get to you. If that happens Sarah you... you-"

"You're NOT Decker, Chuck. Neither is Casey or Beckman. I'll get out before that."

"Okay. Where is your gun?"

"Where would I hide a gun in this thing?"

"At least take a knife."

"Chuck, his goal is to get me out of this. His hands will be every where. If he finds a knife he will kill me. I have my earpiece. Just get into the security cams, I'll be fine. Okay."

Sarah put her hand on Chuck's cheek and leaned into kiss him. He quickly responded and put his hands on her waist.

"I love you." Sarah whispered

"I love you too. Be safe, please, both of you." Chuck whispered back as he placed a kiss on her stomach.

IN THE BUILDING

"How's it going walker?" Casey asked through her earpiece

"Good, how's Chuck coming on surveillance?" Sarah replied

"Almost there!" Chuck said

Sarah was taken by some guards down to a big meeting room with a small platform in the middle. She was taken to the center where the guards took off her handcuffs. One of the guards backhanded her before grabbing her by her hair and looking her up and down.

"Behave." He said

The man let go of her hair and shoved on to the platform. Sarah knew the routine and began to turn around slowly. The men in the room all stared at her in a suggestive manner, bids being placed all around.

"Walker, make him buy you!" Casey demanded

Sarah turned around again and stopped in front of the target so he could look her over.

The man gave her a once over before placing the highest bid. Nobody bid against him. A guard came and kicked Sarah behind her legs making her fall to her knees. He yanked her hair back while another guard handcuffed her again. She was then pulled up to her feet and taken with the mark down the hallway into a private room.

"Chuck, they are taking her into the room, hurry up with surveillance!" Casey yelled

"I'm hurrying!"

"Morgan, get out of the building and get to van." Casey ordered

Sarah was pushed into the room and her handcuffs were taken off. Sarah surveyed the room. A king bed lay on the far corner decked with golden sheets and navy pillows. The dresser in front of her was covered in drugs, an old line of cocaine lay on the edge. The wall had two bars, one near the top and the other near the bottom. Handcuffs were connected to both. Sarah knew all to well what they were for, and prayed he wouldn't _use them._

" _Please hurry Chuck."_ Sarah thought

"Bring her back when you're done." The guard said to the mark

The guard left the room, locking the door behind him. Sarah was left alone with the mark. She stood still as the man ran his hands up and down her body, his head near her neck.

"Hey Beckman's on the monitor." Chuck said as he continued to work

Casey and Morgan both turned to the screen to see the general's face staring back at them.

"What's the update?" Beckman asked

Casey spoke up, "Our original plan didn't go through. Walker has the mark in a private room, we are waiting for surveillance to come through, Chuck is working on that."

"I have surveillance and sound. You can turn the earpiece off." Chuck said

Morgan reached across Casey and hit some buttons to turn the sound off. Suddenly feedback was let off.

"Wrong button moron!" Casey slapped Morgan and hit the correct button

Sarah bit her top lip as the feedback rang in her ear at an intense volume.

"You're wearing a wire." The mark stated

Sarah was panicked, her face barely showed it. She was terrified for herself and _her baby._ She knew she had no weapon and there was nothing she could use. She could maybe hurt him, but too much would hurt the baby and she was unable to do much without hurting herself either.

The mark pulled out a gun and pointed it her head.

"Shit!" Chuck yelled as he took his headphones off, grabbed a gun and ran out of the van.

"Bartowski! Walker can handle herself!" Casey yelled as Chuck ran out the door

Chuck had heard the man say he knew she was wearing a wire. He had to get to his wife.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

"Up against the wall!" The man said as he gestured to the wall with bars.

Sarah did as she was told and put her hands up so he could handcuff her. Doing what he said was her best shot. He clasped the handcuffs around her wrist and then her ankles

"Who do you work for?" He demanded

"Nobody."

"You want to play games huh, okay."

Papazian slapped Sarah across the face before coming up close to her.

"How about I have a little fun before I kill you, huh?"

His eyes trailed down her body, an evil glint in his eye. His hands ran down her chest and dragged across the front of her lower stomach. He placed his hands on the inside of her thighs and ran them back up to her stomach, then going lower to rest between her legs, the other tracing her abdomen.

"What is this?" He asked as he touched Sarah's scar

Sarah said nothing and just looked straight ahead.

"It looks fairly new, a year old maybe. Let's have some fun."

He pulled out a knife from one of the doors in the dresser and walked toward Sarah.

"It would be a shame to spill blood on this carpet. It's quite expensive." Papazian placed the knife just so it was hovering above the red line.

"I'm asking you one more time. Who do you work for?"

Sarah didn't even hear the question. She was only focused on the knife. She could feel the blade against her and tried not show any sign of pain.

"Okay then." He placed the tip of the knife on the left side and pressed lightly.

"No please, I'm pregnant!"

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

"What!" Casey and Beckman both yelled at the same time when they heard Sarah scream over the monitor that showed surveillance of the building.

"Casey, Morgan get in the building!"

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

"Even more fun, twice the kill. You could say, killing two birds with one stone."

The man laughed and turned to the knife once more. He was interrupted as the door swung open and a gun was pointed at his head. The man turned to the side and his knife went with him slashing across Sarah's stomach drawing blood.

Sarah cried out as the knife stuck her. It didn't hurt too bad, she had endured worse, but the fear was enough to send her into shock.

Chuck glanced over at Sarah quickly, his eyes full of fear as he saw the blood dripping onto the floor, mixed with tears that fell from her eyes.

"Put the knife down!"

"You wouldn't shoot me, you're too weak." Papazian smirked and turned his knife on Sarah, who was trying hard not to cry.

Chuck pulled the trigger on the gun and shot the man in the shoulder sending him backwards. Chuck walked toward the man and hit his head hard with the back of his gun,, knocking him out.

Making sure he was out, Chuck tossed the gun to the side and searched the man for a key to the handcuffs. Once he found it he turned to Sarah. He took of his jacket and applied some pressure to her stomach to stop the blood. He flashed on the cut and concluded it wasn't deep enough to do much harm, and started to unlock her handcuffs. He started with her ankles and then moved to her wrists. She collapsed into his arms as soon as she was free.

Chuck wrapped one arm around her waste holding her up and the other cradled her head.

"I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry." Sarah repeated over and over, her body wracking with sobs

"Shh, Its okay. I'm here, you're okay." Chuck whispered against the top of her head as he stroked her hair and guided her to the floor as he held her tight.

He tried to loosen his grip so he could check her stomach but she tightened her grip on his shirt and cried harder.

"I need to check on your stomach."

"I'm so sorry." Sarah pleaded and gripped his shirt tighter

Chuck pulled her close and continued to stroke her hair while Sarah continued to cry into Chuck's chest.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

"You ready Morgan?" Casey asked

Both Casey and Morgan stood outside of the building preparing a plan to get Chuck and Sarah out of there. Casey had his gun drawn and Morgan was given a tranq pistol.

"Yah, let's kick some butt!"

Casey grunted and kicked open the door revealing an empty hallway.

"Follow my lead." Casey instructed

Both of the men crept down the hallway before checking around the corner. What Casey saw shocked him. Men were lying on the ground unconscious there weapons next to them.

"Follow the line of bodies." Casey said

"Did Chuck do all of this? And by himself!" Morgan asked

"Remind me not to ever hurt Walker." Casey joked

"Ooh, look that door is open on the right." Morgan pointed out

"Let's go. But be careful, and don't make a sound!" Casey demanded

Morgan saluted him and followed Casey's lead down the hall. Each of them stepped over the unconscious guards that lined the hallway. Casey came to bedroom and turned the corner quickly, only to be met with Chuck pointing a gun at him. Morgan came in after Chuck, put the gun down and started to talk before Casey held up his hand. Morgan silenced and backed away. Casey had never seen Sarah so vulnerable. She didn't even turn to look at Casey when he came in. She didn't even notice. She was on her knees, her head buried in Chuck's chest. Her body was shaking. Blood slowly dripped from her stomach and was staining the floor below her. Her clothes weren't exactly in place, her body being revealed more than she would be comfortable with. She was shivering and shaking uncontrollably. She didn't even seem to notice, she was only focused on saying one phrase over and over, _'I'm so sorry.'_ Casey took off his jacket and walked toward Sarah silently so as not to startle her. He gently draped it over her back and then turned to Chuck.

"Beckman has a private jet waiting for us. She wants us in DC immediately." Casey said calmly

Sarah lifted her head up and turned to look at Chuck before she started hyperventilating. Chuck turned to Casey and nodded his head before turning back to Sarah. Casey and Morgan left the room and closed the door behind them.

Chuck placed his hands on Sarah's shoulders and looked into her eyes.

"Breathe... It's okay... Breathe... Everything is fine... Breathe." Chuck said to Sarah

She tried to match his breaths, her grip tightening on his shoulders.

"B-Beckman knows."

"It's okay, I'm not going to let anybody hurt you again."

Sarah wrapped her arms around Chuck her head against his shoulder.

"Can you stand?" Chuck asked as he began to pull her up

She winced slightly, it was barely noticeable and wouldn't phase most but Chuck noticed and put his arm under her knees lifting her into his arms. He placed Casey's jacket on top of her. Sarah's abdomen had stopped bleeding and her cries had softened. Her hands clutched Chuck's shirt her head resting against his Chest. Chuck left the room and saw Casey and Morgan in the hallway leaning against the wall.

"Our men are coming to get Papazian." Casey informed

The four of them left the building. Sarah shivered and tensed when the cold air hit her back and legs. Chuck rubbed her back and started walking quicker to get the jet.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

"There's a room in the back you guys can take. Morgan and I are fine on the couches." Casey said to Chuck

"Thanks." Chuck replied

Chuck headed to the back of the plane with Sarah still in his arms. When he entered the bedroom he gently placed Sarah on the bed.

"I'll be right back." Chuck said as he brushed a piece of hair and placed it behind her ear.

Chuck left the room leaving the door slightly open and walked toward Casey.

"Where is Sarah's bag?" Chuck asked

Casey reached above Chuck and pulled out Sarah's suitcase in the overhead compartment.

"Thanks." Chuck said as he grabbed the suitcase from Casey, "Is there a first aid kit?"

"Uh, yah. Follow me." Casey replied and headed toward the front end of the plane. He opened a cabinet and pulled out a large red box with the Red Cross symbol across the front.

"This is huge!" Chuck pointed out

"It's a CIA plane, agents get hurt, a lot." Casey retorted

Chuck nodded and tried to take the kit from Casey but ended up dropping it.

"Here, I'll take it back." Casey said as he picked up the box

"Thanks."

"Is Walk- Sarah, going to be okay?" Casey asked

"Eventually." Chuck sighed

"And the baby?"

"Hopefully."

Casey and Chuck both walked into the back room. Sarah was laying on her side, under the covers, facing the wall.

"Do you need any help?" Casey asked as he set the first aid kit at the foot of the bed

"I've got the old intersect to help me." Chuck said tapping on his head, "I'll let you know if you're needed though. Thanks."

Casey nodded and left the room

Chuck walked over to Sarah and knelt down beside her. He brushed some hair out of her face and stroked her cheek with his thumb.

"How are you doing?" Chuck asked

"I'll be fine, I'm just worried." Sarah said as she placed her hand on her stomach.

"Um, Beckman wants us in DC for a briefing and she wants you to see an OB/GYN that specifically works for the CIA. She's supposed to be one of the best. And... before you start freaking out, she just wants you to be checked. However, that's not for many more hours, so she asked me to do everything I can using the intersect to help you. With your permission of course." Chuck stated as he held her hand

"Why wouldn't I let you?"

"You just had a full blown panic attack in the middle of the mission, nobody could get through to you. I mean, you flinched when Casey put his jacket on you. That's never happened and I had no clue what to do."

"I'm sorry I put myself and our baby in danger. I just felt like I was stuck. After everything the CIA has done, I just felt hopeless. I know you don't know about my training and all of my missions. I assume that's what you were talking about to Ellie."

Chuck nodded his head and looked down.

"Its not that I don't want to tell you or I don't trust you, I just can't bring myself to tell them. It was more or less traumatizing. But Chuck, I trust you with my life, why would you even think that I wouldn't let you help me."

"You just scared me, Sarah. I've never seen you like that before." Chuck said as he held her hand

"I know... I was frightened beyond belief. I thought... I though I had lost the baby and... and I couldn't lose another one Chuck. I can't take it anymore, my body can't take it anymore."

"Which is why we are going to see the gynecologist first thing and you will be doing next to nothing for the next 6ish months."

Sarah nodded her head and gave Chucks hand a gentle squeeze letting him know she understood.

"Lets get this wound cleaned and temporarily stitched until we get to DC."

Chuck helped Sarah get undressed and then grabbed some towels from a closet and helped her shift on top of them.

"First things first..." Chuck trailed off as he opened the first aid kit and flashed.

"Okay, the intersect knows way more than it used to. Um..." Chuck fumbled around in the first aid kit before pulling out a stethoscope and placing it on her lower abdomen.

His ears were filled the soft yet fast thumping of the baby's heartbeat. Chuck let out a sigh of relief and gave the stethoscope to Sarah. She took a deep breath trying to relieve the tension that was built up inside.

"The baby is okay." Chuck said as he rubbed the back of her hand

Chuck reached into the first aid kit and pulled out rubbing alcohol, cotton balls, and sterile pads.

He washed off the dried blood that coated her stomach and dripped down her legs. Picking up scalpel he turned toward Sarah.

"I've got to just cut the dried blood that sealed the wound shut, so I can clean inside the wound so it doesn't get infected." Chuck said as he grabbed a towel and placed it below the cut, "umm I don't know if I can give you a shot to numb the area. The intersect doesn't have a ton of Intel on pregnancy. Do you want something to bite on or we can get Morgan in he-"

"I'll be fine, I've had this done before. It's not to bad." Sarah interrupted

Chuck nodded his head and placed the scalpel on the scar and broke the layer covering it. Blood spilled out and Chuck placed the towel on the blood to soak it up.

"I'm surprised you haven't passed out from all the blood." Sarah teased

"Me too. But being in the CIA, I get more than my fair share. You sure you're not in any pain?" Chuck asked

"I'm okay."

"I've got to clean it now, I'd give you some alcohol to drink but, you know..."

"It's okay, just talk about something." Sarah said as she grabbed his hand

"Okay, um..." Chuck placed the alcoholic wipe on her stomach

Sarah through her head back in pain while clenching her jaw and squeezing Chuck's hand.

"What about a nursery?" Chuck asked

Sarah gritted her teeth as Chuck continued to clean the wound, "What..." Sarah squeezed her eyes shut, "What about it?"

"Well we still have the old crib and a few other pieces of furniture. Do you want to use that or sell it and start fresh?" Chuck asked as he let go of her hand to open the cut a little more

"Ahh!" Sarah cried out before shutting her mouth and sucking in a breath

Chuck looked up at his wife who was trying to hold back tears

"I was thinking we should paint the room a pastel green or a pastel purple, depending on the gender you know?" Chuck said trying to distract his wife

She nodded her head and gripped the sheets of the bed. Chuck had finished cleaning the area and went to grab the needle and thread. He picked it up and looked back at Sarah who still had her eyes shut.

"I'll be right back." Chuck said

He quickly left the room to get more towels. He came back in with the towels in one arm guiding Morgan with the other. Chuck placed the towels on Sarah's Chest and just below her scar and then turned to Morgan.

"You can open your eyes now Morgan." Chuck said

Morgan rushed over to Sarah who took his hand gratefully. Sarah had calmed down from the stinging pain but braced herself for the needle and thread.

"Is there not numbing cream?" Sarah pleaded

"I don't think so." Chuck shuffled the items in the bin around, "It's for CIA and I don't think they have to worry about pregnant women very often so they just have the syringe."

Sarah glared at him with a look that said _now is not the time for jokes, Chuck._

Chuck got the hint , "Morgan just distract her okay."

Morgan jumped out of his haze from staring at the bloody mess in disgust.

"Uh okay." Morgan said, "Well, Alex has been stressing out about the wedding _a ton_. She keeps asking my opinion on things and I just tell her to pick what she wants, I don't really care. That doesn't help the situation. Oh I know! She just sent me a list of all of her favorite things she has narrowed it down to and I'm supposed to choose." Morgan reached for his back pocket to grab his phone while Chuck continued with the stitches.

"Okay, she really like roses but she's deciding between white and red or white and pink." Morgan said

"White and red." Sarah replied

"Got it! What about the cake, three tiers or four?"

"Four."

"For catering, Baskin Robbins or Cold Stone."

"Neither they both sound awful right now." Sarah gagged

Chuck looked up and whispered _Baskin Robbins_.

Morgan nodded, "Okay, what about bi-, uh whoops no we'll skip that one. Ah yes, for the honeymoon we're still debating over a honeymoon suite in a hotel or a private beach hou-"

"Beach house!" Chuck and Sarah both said together

"Trust me, you'll want it." Chuck said as Sarah nodded and looked away

"I'm not even going to ask-"

"Don't!" Chuck and Sarah both said simultaneously

Morgan swallowed and looked back at his phone, "Okay what about, I don't even know what this is for, uh matte or sparkly gold?"

"I'd say matte, but Alex would want sparkly." Sarah said

"Perfect!"

"I'm all done!" Chucks aid

Sarah let out a breath she didn't even realize she was holding.

"Thank you Morgan." Sarah stated

"NO, Thank YOU!" Morgan happily said while walking out of the room

Chuck closed the first aid kit and and placed it on the floor. He went over to Sarah's suitcase and got some fresh clothes out for her to wear. He gave the articles to her and helped her get dressed and settled.

"We still have a several hours before we land. Do you want to get some sleep."

"Yes please." she whispered

Chuck nodded, "I'll leave you be. I'm going to go talk with Casey."

Sarah sat up, ignoring the pain, and grabbed his arm.

"No, please. Stay." She pleaded

Chuck turned back around to look into her eyes which were glistened with tears silently begging him to not go.

"Please don't leave me alone, not right now." she whispered

"Of course."

Chuck turned off the light and climbed into the bed and lied beside her. She curled her body into his. Her head rested on his chest and her hands clung to his shirt. He put his arms around her hugging her close as they fell asleep.


	23. Chapter 23

**AN: Sorry I have been taking so long to update, I decided to go into a completely different direction. If I'm taking too long, feel free to comment and remind me to update, please. A little more angst before we get into the lightheartedness that this show is. Also, don't kill me for this chapter.**

WASHINGTON DC

"Alright, I'm Dr. Lund. I've been assigned to be your gynecologist during your pregnancy. I work specifically with the CIA and NSA but I also have worked outside of it. General Beckman has given me access to all previous health records including details while you were in the CIA. I have been assigned to reside in Burbank during your pregnancy as well as six months following the birth. I will not do anything without your permission. I need you to trust me. You and this baby are my utmost concern. If there is anything I need to know or you would like me to know, please tell me. If you feel uncomfortable in anyway, please let me know and we will proceed from there. I will let you know what I am doing step by step as we go along. Although I have been assigned by General Beckman, that does not mean she is aware of everything. Doctor-patient confidentiality still resides. She has not and will not view any medical records without your permission. Everything we do is up to you, Sarah. Do you understand?"

Sarah nodded her head and squeezed Chuck's hand. Chuck noticed and used his free hand to turn her head toward his.

"Hey, breathe, she's going to help us get through this safely, okay?" Chuck whispered in a calming voice as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear

Sarah nodded and let out a deep breath before turning back to the doctor.

"Now Sarah, before we begin, I need to know about the mission that happened yesterday in Beijing. I have been given the mission report and I know about the knife wound and that your husband temporarily stitched it, but is there anything else I need to know, anything that happened that could affect you or the baby?" The doctor asked with a concerned look

"No, nothing like that." Sarah replied

"Okay. I assume that you want Chuck with you during appointments and the birth?" She questioned

"Yes, Chuck stays, always." Sarah quickly said

The doctor smiled and turned her attention toward the computer.

"Okay, I want to check on your baby first and then we will proceed from there."

The doctor smiled and grabbed her stethoscope that was wrapped around her neck. She drew Sarah's gown up until it rested just below her chest and then placed the stethoscope on Sarah's stomach.

"The heartbeat is perfectly normal so that is always a good sign. I'm going to do an ultra sound now. I'll be right back with the equipment." The doctor said and then left the room.

Chuck got up from his seat and went to look out the window, his back turned toward Sarah. Sarah could tell he was upset at her. That he wasn't happy with the decision she had made today.

"I'm sorry, Chuck. I was scared and-"

"How could you do this Sarah? You knew the risks! What you did was stupid and foolish-"

"I know that you're mad, bu-"

Chuck turned toward her with a stern and disappointed look on his face. "Mad, is an understatement, Sarah."

"But I'm okay and… and the baby is okay so-"

"Do not say it's fine! What if you weren't okay, or the baby wasn't. You would never forgive yourself. I would never forgive myself for letting you go. I can't force you to do what is right Sarah, but for once, stop thinking like a spy and start thinking like a wife or a mother or just Sarah. You're not alone! I try to remind you every second I get but…" Chuck trailed off

"I'm sorry." Sarah whispered trying to hold back tears

"I'm going to go check in with Casey and Beckman. You can meet me when your done with the appointment." With that Chuck left the room without even glancing at Sarah

A few minutes later, the doctor came back into the room with the ultra sound equipment.

"Where did Chuck go?" She asked

"He, Uh had a meeting with Beckman he had to go to." Sarah said

"Is everything alright?"

"Yah, everything's fine." Sarah lied

"Are you ready to see your baby?"

"Yes."

Dr. Lund opened up Sarah's gown and applied the gel to her lower abdomen before placing the scanner on top.

"There is your baby."

A small image popped up on the screen that showed the baby slightly moving around.

"Would you like to know the gender?"

"Actually, can you just put it in an envelope for me. I want to be able to open it with Chuck."

"Of course. I'll be right back." The doctor said

She handed some paper towels to Sarah to wipe her stomach off before leaving the room.

Sarah wiped off her stomach and threw the paper towels in the trash. She got back on the bed and lied back down, thinking about her conversation with Chuck, just moments earlier.

It wasn't like Chuck to leave the room before finishing a conversation. She wouldn't ever expect him to leave the room in the middle of a doctor's appointment. He hadn't even seen the baby yet and he knew Sarah would have to have her stomach stitched back up and an exam before leaving. He always wanted to be there for her when she was hurt. He's never been this mad at her before. What should she do? Maybe she should call Ellie. No, Chuck is probably already on the phone with her. There really isn't anybody she can talk to. Nobody knows she is pregnant. She doesn't want to know until the baby is born and she knows it's healthy. She can't do that though, she'll start showing soon, and in a couple months, not even a flowy blouse will be able to hide it.

The doctor came back in the room, an envelope in her hand. She placed it on the counter and grabbed some supplies for Sarah's wound. She examined it over before grabbing a needle and numbing the area.

"Chuck did a great job. The wound is not very deep, I just want to stitch it up because it is wide and just deep enough to worry me."

After she was done she placed the supplies on the counter and slipped some new gloves on.

"Alright, feet in the stirrups, I'm going to do a vaginal exam if that is alright."

Sarah nodded and slipped her feet into the stirrups.

"Any pain while using the bathroom?"

"No."

"Pain during sex?"

"No."

"Any spotting or heavy bleeding."

"No."

"Good." The doctor finished and slid her gloves off, "Everything is totally fine. I'm a little worried about your weight. It's slightly lower than I would like you to be at. It's not too bad though, just more water and a few more calories each day should be fine. You are cleared for exercise. Just nothing hardcore. No weights, sparring, or anything of the sort. Because this is a high-risk pregnancy I would like you to limit exercise. Jogging and swimming would be preferred. No hot tubs, baths, raw fish, deli meats, heavy lifting, you know the gist. Please do not over exert yourself. This needs to be a VERY low stress pregnancy. Don't exercise too much, don't work too much, and don't stress yourself out. That is very important. I am assigned to be only your OB from this moment on. I have other patients for gynecology, but Beckman wanted you to be my top priority. If you have any pain in your abdomen at all, come in. If you start to develop a fever, come in. If you start having abnormal symptoms, come in. If you start spotting, come in. Go with your gut Sarah. If you think something is wrong, you need to visit me. Remember I will be in Burbank at a temporary private CIA clinic and ER. You have my number, if something is wrong, try to remember to call me ahead of time so I can get things ready. This is very important Sarah, do you understand?"

"Yes, thank you."

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Chuck had texted Sarah that the meeting went well and that he had gotten a room for her cause he would be spending the night with Morgan in his hotel room. Sarah felt sick to her stomach. Not from the pregnancy, but from being in a fight with Chuck. They rarely ever fought. They were supposed to be the light hearted dream couple. But, here they were, fighting because she had made a stupid decision, and put her baby in danger. Was she even ready to be a mother? Mabey the death of her baby boy was the universe's way of telling her that being a mother wasn't in the cards for her. But Chuck wanted a big family, and she doesn't even know if she can still give that to him.

Sarah made her way to the office where they were meeting with Beckman. She hoped Chuck would be there, but at the same time she prayed he wasn't. She didn't know if she could make it through a conversation right now. She knew she had to talk with Beckman about tonight's mission. She knew she messed up, big time.

When she made it to the office, the first thing she noticed was that Casey was the only one in the room.

"Where is Beckman? I got a message saying she wanted to talk about tonight's mission." Sarah asked

"She decided not to. Just get some rest." Casey said, "Chuck gave me your keycard. Your bags are already in the room."

Casey handed her the keycard and left the room. Sarah sat down in a chair as she gathered her thoughts. Casey seemed to be on Chuck's side as well. Ellie probably was too. Ugh, she hated taking sides. They never fought. Sarah grabbed her keys and was about to leave when she heard Chuck coming. She quickly grabbed her stuff and headed into another room. When he came in, he was talking on the phone.

"I don't know El, I expected more from Sarah." Chuck said as he sat down and put the phone on speaker.

Sarah knew she shouldn't be doing this. _No secrets, no lies._ That was their rule. She had broke that rule though. She signed that contract with Beckman and she never told Chuck. She didn't exactly remember making the contract until Beckman brought it up. That was her problem, she couldn't remember the big moments in her life. She couldn't even remember their wedding.

Chuck had his head in his hands, his elbows resting on his thighs. Ellie and him were talking back and forth about what had happened. Ellie was trying to console him, urging him to go talk to Sarah.

"Okay, Chuck, what do you want to do then?" Ellie asked

"I don't know?" He replied

Sarah continued to listen in on the conversation, her ear pressed against the doorway.

"I got separate hotel rooms for us tonight. I just don't know if I could see her tonight."

"Have you tried talking to her?"

"No. What do I say? She put, not only herself, but our child in danger. She was so upset when our last baby died and now that she's pregnant again, the first thing that she does is put the baby in danger. That doesn't sound logical to me!" Ellie stayed quiet as Chuck continued to talk. "Isn't a mother supposed to protect her child? I just felt helpless. I couldn't do anything. I'm not carrying the baby, she is."

"Do you trust her Chuck?" Ellie asked

"How do you mean?"

"Do you trust her with your child?"

Sarah mouth dropped slightly open. Her mind was racing.

"I don't know right now." Chuck sighed

Sarah grabbed her stuff and opened the door. Chuck turned his head, surprised to see his wife. Then he realized what she had heard. He could tell by the tears on her face. He prepared himself for the lecture he was about to receive from Sarah, and possibly Ellie. But, Sarah didn't yell or scream, she didn't even look him in the eye. She simply wiped her eyes and went over to the table Chuck was sitting at. She stopped at the edge and dropped her head before letting a couple more tears fall. Then she opened her palm, placed her wedding ring on the table, and quickly left.


	24. Chapter 24

It was five in the morning and Sarah hadn't answered her phone. Casey said he hadn't seen her since he gave her the room key and Morgan hadn't seen her since the mission. Chuck was starting to freak out. He shouldn't have been so hard on her, she obviously had beaten herself up about it already and she was sorry, but he still couldn't fathom the idea of putting their child in danger. It didn't make sense to him.

Chuck took a deep breath before knocking on the door of Sarah's hotel room. When there was no answer, he took out his own keycard and inserted it into the slot before opening the door. The room seemed empty. The bed was still made and her unopened suitcase rested on top of it. She was there though. Her phone was on the nightstand next to a strip of ultrasound pictures that lay atop an envelope and the bathroom light was on.

"Sarah?" Chuck called as he walked toward the bathroom door

No answer.

"Sarah?" He called again, this time knocking on the door

No answer.

Finding the door unlocked, he walked inside only to find Sarah asleep on the bathroom floor. She was never a heavy sleeper. Years of being in the CIA prevented that. Being pregnant, stressed, and exhausted has changed that, however. The toilet lid was open, indicating she had been throwing up. Chuck sighed and left the bathroom. He walked towards the bed and put her suitcase on the ground and turned down the bed. He went back to the bathroom and picked Sarah up and laid her on the mattress and rolled the blankets up to cover her. She stirred a little at the new sensation but thought nothing of it.

About an hour later, Sarah woke up to find Chuck looking at the new ultrasound pictures with tears in his eyes.

"lt's alright." Sarah whispered, "The baby, I mean. It's healthy."

Chuck sniffed and nodded.

"I asked the doctor to put write down the sex and put it an envelope so we could open it together." Sarah said as she looked down at the quilt that covered her torso.

Chuck wiped some of his tears away and slightly laughed before shaking his head and crying again.

"I'm sorry, Sarah. I'm so, so sorry." Chuck began as set the picture down and dropped his head. "I should have never said that. It was stupid and selfish and I'm sorry. I trust you with the baby. I know it wasn't… that you didn't…"

"Stop." Sarah interrupted. "Why are you apologizing? You have every right not to trust me. I put our baby in danger. It's just that what Decker did and what Ryker wanted to do, I just suspected that Beckman might… I don't know. But when I was in the room and he chained me to the wall, I was just so scared. I've never… I didn't know what was going to happen and I was scared, no, terrified. I thought he was gonna.." Sarah choked on her tears and pursed her lips together, "… and you were going to have watch. But then he had the knife and I just thought that 'this is it, he's going to kill my baby.' And I couldn't…" Sarah started to sob, her hand covering her mouth

Chuck rushed over to the side of the bed and took her in his arms and cradled her head. "I wouldn't have let him do anything to you. I wouldn't ever leave you there." Chuck said "The baby is okay, you're okay." He ran his fingers through her hair. It had grown back longer over the years and reached past her shoulders to the length Chuck preferred. He pushed her out slightly so he could look into her eyes. They were a dull color, almost grey. They had been like that for a couple days. It was the lack of food and sleep, the stress she had put on her shoulders, and the fear of losing her child, their child. He tucked a strand behind her ear and lifted her chin up. "I left the van when he found out you were wearing a wire. Is that all that happened?" Chuck asked

"He, uh, he did touch me." Sarah shifted a little

Chuck leaned forward and kissed her head. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything… If I had been there-"

"You were there." She paused to look him in the eye "You were there, and you saved me and the baby. You're always there."

"Sarah please know that I DO trust you with our child. I was just… there's no excuse but believe me, I didn't mean it. I had forgotten about everything. I called Beckman up and she had no record of what Decker did, but she's not surprised. Pregnancy falls under medical reasons and you can leave the CIA because of it. It's just that it doesn't happen often. So, don't beat yourself up about it. You're going to be a phenomenal mother. Don't forget that."

Sarah nodded and wiped some more tears away.

"I'm sorry I left my wedding ring. It was a spur of the moment thing, I was just hurt, and you've never been mad at me like that, so I just assumed…" Sarah trailed off

"Do you remember our prenup?" Chuck asked

Sarah laughed, "Yes."

"And what did it say?"

"I, Sarah Bartowski, will never even mention the word divorce."

"Something along those lines." Chuck smiled and took her wedding ring out of his pocket. Sarah held out her hand and slid the ring back on. "Perfect fit."

"Like Cinderella." Sarah smiled

"And it should never come off again." Chuck reiterated

Sarah leaned in to kiss him, her hands resting on his cheeks and his on her waist. Sarah leaned into his touch before breaking the kiss. "Never." She said as she kissed him again. One of Chuck's hands traveled up her back to thread through her hair, the other still planted firmly on her waist bringing her closer. He then broke the kiss this time. "Except you should probably take it off when we have sex. I don't want to explain to the doctor why I need stitches _down there…_ Again. "

Sarah laughed and reached over onto the nightstand to grab the yellow envelope. "Wanna find out?"

"Yes, but let me set up the camera on my phone to video." Chuck said excitedly

"You're such a dork."

"Yes, but I'm your dork."

Sarah smiled and sat on the bed with her legs tucked under her, the envelope in her lap. Chuck soon joined her and sat down eagerly.

"Should we open it? I mean it might be a fun surprise. Plus-"

"I'm opening it." Sarah said as she pulled the top open and took the paper out

"It's a boy. It's a boy!" She exclaimed

"We're getting a boy!" Chuck yelled as he kissed her, "I'm getting a son."

Chuck leaned in to kiss Sarah once again. His hands were on her waist, pulling her flush against him and hers were threading through his hair. She shifted her legs until she was sitting on his lap, straddling him.

"I love you so much." Chuck whispered against her lips

Sarah responded by kissing him harder, her hands lingering on his chest. Chuck slipped his hands underneath her shirt and placed them gently on her stomach before his lips traveled down to her neck making her moan.

"You might want to take you wedding ring off now." Chuck said with a smile

"And you might want to turn the camera off." Sarah replied

4444444444444444444

BURBANK, CALIFORNIA

"Chuck where are the raisins?" Sarah asked

"Uh, we don't have raisins." Chuck replied with a puzzled look

"Why not?"

"Because you hate raisins."

"But you like them."

"I tolerate them."

"Okay, well we need raisins."

"I'll add that to the shopping list."

"Add olives as well."

"Okay, who are you and what have you done with my wife." Chuck laughed

"Do we have celery?" Sarah asked as she looked in the fridge

"Aw, there's my wife."

Sarah pulled the celery out of the fridge and took a bite out of it before leaning against the counter.

"Do we have Dramamine or Zolfran or something." Sarah asked

"We have Pepto Bismal." Chuck suggested

"I can't take that."

"I'll pick up some Dramamine."

"Thank you."

"Anything else?"

"Condoms."

"Um, we are already pregnant, I don't think that is going to do much."

"Not for us, Morgan and Alex's wedding is in 4 days and you are in charge of wrecking their car. We already have most of the stuff, just not condoms."

"Oh, yah… Thanks for reminding me."

"No problem." Sarah said as she quickly kissed him. "Now, scooch, Alex is supposed to be here any minute to discuss final wedding plans."

"Alright, love you." Chuck said

"Love you too, Sarah replied as she kissed him goodbye

About 10 minutes later the doorbell rang and Sarah let Alex in.

"Hey Alex." Sarah said as she stepped aside to let Alex walk into the house.

Alex stepped into the house and gave Sarah a soft smile before taking her coat off and placing it over the edge of the couch.

Sarah noticed something was off but decided to let it go for now.

"Um, Ellie is flying in tomorrow and she said she would be happy to pick up the flowers, so that problem is solved." Sarah said to Alex

"Oh, I didn't think she could fly in her condition." Alex stated

"She had the baby about a week ago. Did Morgan not tell you?"

"Oh, uh yah he did, I just forgot."

Sarah definitely knew something was wrong now and decided to break the ice.

"Alex, what's going on?"

"It's nothing, just wedding jitters."

"Uh huh… Yah, except wedding jitters look like you're nervous about going on a rollercoaster, not like you just found out some big news, possibly from an at-home test you picked up at a pharmacy."

"How'd you know?" Alex quietly asked while looking at the floor

"You couldn't say the word pregnant, uh you forgot Ellie had her baby, and you keep looking at my stomach like it's a ghost. I was in the CIA for about 10 years, I picked up a few things." Sarah smiled

Alex laughed a little and shuffled her feet.

"Plus," Sarah said as she placed her hand on Alex's shoulders, "I've experienced both, and they are _very_ different."

"Yah, you could say that."

"But, that's not it, is it?" Sarah asked as she leaned against a chair

Alex closed her eyes and shook her head. A couple tears fell from her eyes and then she looked back at Sarah.

"I haven't told Morgan yet, which will be fine, he'll be thrilled, but my mom and dad are a different story. I'm about 6, maybe 7 weeks, I'm not sure I'm kind of irregular, but if I tell them after the wedding, they… well they can do the math and my mom will be livid that I could be this stupid and my dad may just about kill Morgan. A baby isn't exactly the best way to start a marriage. Plus, you're not supposed to tell anyone until you're about 12 weeks, just in case. If I lose the baby though…" Alex started to cry a little more

Sarah stepped up and wrapped Alex in a hug before leading her to the couch to talk to her. They sat down at opposite ends and Alex wiped her tears.

"I know it doesn't seem like it, but think will work out. Morgan will be thrilled to have a mini nerd." Sarah laughed and so did Alex, "and I don't know your mom at all, but she can't control what happened, but your mom isn't, well, Chuck's. Don't ever tell him I said that, but that woman scares the hell out of me, and I don't get scared."

Alex and Sarah both laughed at that.

"As for Casey, well I know he's your dad, but I know him pretty well. You need to tell him or else he will figure it out. A few years ago, I thought I was pregnant and while we were on a mission, Casey figured it out, before Chuck. But he's not going to kill Morgan. He might be upset at first, but give him 5 minutes and he'll be good. If you want though you don't have to tell Morgan. Him and Chuck are clueless, you could go the whole nine months and he wouldn't suspect a thing."

Alex smiled. "Thank you Sarah, I know that your circumstances with your ba- uh, Finn, were different, however, what if I do lose the baby. Everyone will know and I…" Alex sighed

"I… have had a miscarriage before, and it, well it really sucks. But if it does happen, you can always come talk to me. Trust me, I wish I had someone to talk to at the time who knew what it was like."

"Thank you."

"Of course."

Sarah hugged Alex again and then stood back.

"Okay, the wedding," Sarah started, "Everything is done."

"Except one thing…" Alex smiled, "The dress."

"It doesn't fit." Sarah finished

"Not quite."

"That's okay, we can fix it."

"You can do that?"

"Heh, no. But I know someone who can."

444444444444444444444444444

Sarah and Alex were both in the car driving into downtown LA with Alex's wedding dress in the back.

"Okay, so this guy, his name is Nick, he owns, well an adult shop, but he also alters clothing as a side job and he's fantastic. Just to warn you though he is a little flamboyant." Sarah said as she pursed her lips

"So he's gay." Alex laughed

"Yes, which is fine, but he's um, a little handsy. But he's fabulous. Uh, with sewing."

Alex tried to suppress a laugh, "Sarah are you blushing?"

Sarah quickly pulled over and turned to Alex.

"Yes. I usually would never admit that, but Alex he is so hot. He looks like Ryan Gosling and Channing Tatum had a baby that was blessed by the hands of God. And ugh, my hormones are all over the place right now and I haven't had sex in two days because Chuck has been busy with work, and just ugh." Sarah said as she placed her head on the steering wheel

Alex was laughing now while Sarah groaned.

"You sure you're okay?" Alex laughed

Sarah looked up and laughed "Yah, I'm fine. Let's just park here and walk the rest of the way, his shop is just before the light."

444444444444444444444444444444444

Sarah and Alex walked into the shop and started looking for Nick.

"Um, how did you meet this guy Sarah?" Alex asked

"I… found him while trying to get someone to alter my dress for my wedding." Sarah replied

"Oh my Gosh! Sarah?" Nick yelled as he ran up to the two women. "It's been forever, how are you darling!?"

"I'm doing good." Sarah smiled

"And you have a bun in the oven!" Nick said as he crouched down to touch Sarah's belly

Alex looked at Sarah and quietly laughed as Sarah awkwardly shifted.

"And the dress you're wearing is so good. Accents all your curves perfectly. What are we looking for, I bet your hormones are everywhere and your cute husband probably can't resist those right now." Nick said pointing to Sarah's chest before turning back around and leading them into the shop.

"I don't know, she hasn't had sex in two days." Alex muttered

"Shut up." Sarah laughed

"Come back here I had a few new arrivals and… Oh! Oh my gosh! I have the perfect thing for you, it's a new design but-"

"Actually Nick," Sarah quickly cut him off, "My friend Alex here needs her wedding dress altered before her wedding. Just a couple of touchups."

"Oh of course, let's go upstairs."

Nick led them out of the back room and up the stairs to a loft. The place was covered in fabric and boxes of all different sizes. There was a window on one wall and several paintings on another. Mannequins lined the railing on the edge, adorned in different styles of clothing.

Nick raced over to one wall and started sifting through some boxes while Alex and Sarah stayed near the stairs.

"You didn't want him to keep talking? He seemed to _really_ know what you wanted." Alex teased

4 DAYS LATER

3:07 AM

Sarah was once again huddled against the edge of the toilet catching her breath after dry heaving for almost an hour. Chuck was by her side, gently rubbing his thumb over her hand while his eyes started to close.

"You can go back to sleep if you want." Sarah suggested

"No, no, of course not, I'll go to bed when you do." Chuck said as he suppressed a yawn

"We have to get up super early though, and plus you have to help Mor-"

"I already told you, I'll go to bed when you do."

"I don't want to get back into bed, it's too warm. The tile feels nice."

"One sec." Chuck said as he got up and headed to the bedroom that connected to the master bath. He grabbed a couple of pillows off the bed and a small blanket and came back to the bathroom to find Sarah leaning over the toilet again. He dropped the pillows and headed over to her rubbing her back and grabbing the cold cloth off of the counter. When she was done he placed the cloth on her forehead and placed the pillows on the ground and up against the bathtub. He leaned back on them and urged Sarah to lie on his chest. They fell asleep on the bathroom floor with the blanket draped lightly over them.

7:30 AM

Chuck barely heard the alarm coming from inside their bedroom. He gently nudged Sarah awake before getting up to turn the alarm off. When he came back Sarah had the shower started and was getting undressed. Chuck turned the sink on and began to shave while Sarah took a shower. After shaving Chuck stepped in the shower and rinsed off before getting out and handing Sarah a fresh towel.

"What time do you need to be at Alex's mom's house?" Chuck asked

"10:00, but I still need to get some things ready and pick up the dress." Sarah sighed

"Are you feeling okay?" Chuck asked as he went to feel her forehead

"I'll make it. Move over though, I need to dry my hair."

Sarah started doing her hair while Chuck left to go get breakfast ready. He came back about a half hour later with toast, oatmeal, and tea for the both of them. He reached into the medicine cabinet in the bathroom and pulled out Sarah's pre-natal vitamins before taking a couple out and placing them on her plate.

"Thank you." Sarah said as she gave him a small kiss

Sarah was working on her makeup by the time Chuck was dressed and ready so he decided to go pack up some things they needed for the day and call Morgan to make sure he was up. Sarah soon came out in full hair and makeup wearing leggings and one of Chuck's t-shirts.

"You wearing that to the wedding?" Chuck teased

"No, I'm coming home to get changed and touch up my hair and makeup after I get done at Alex's."

"It's a nice day for a wedding. It's not too hot or too cold. It's pretty perfect." Chuck noted as he hugged his wife.

"You know they waited for us." Sarah said

"Hmmm?"

"They waited to have the wedding, they had a date picked out and invitations made and then we had everything happen so they waited for things to clear up."

"You know Morgan was going to originally propose with a ring pop."

"What color?" Sarah joked

12:50 PM

Sarah came in the front door looking extremely tired while Chuck was sitting at the table eating lunch.

"I am so happy it is not my wedding day right now." Sarah stated as she sat down beside Chuck, "Alex is so stressed, I feel so bad."

"Morgan seems pretty chill. He asked me what color tennis shoes he should wear." Chuck said

"Please tell me…"

"Don't worry, I told him red. I thought it would go with the flowers."

"Ha, ha." Sarah replied in a sarcastic manner, "Did you make something for lunch?"

"Yes, there is a plate in the fridge for you."

"Thank God."

"Hurry though, you still have to get dressed and we leave in approximately 43 minutes."

1:15 PM

Sarah stood in the mirror and straightened her dress before fixing her hair.

"You look perfect." Chuck whispered as he stared at her from the doorway. She turned to face him, smiling when she saw tears in his eyes.

Sarah had on a knee length dress that was short sleeved and glazed with a light rose color. The dress was formfitting and highlighted her small baby bump perfectly. Chuck's eyes were fixed on her stomach as he walked toward her and cupped her face before kissing her thoroughly. He moved down to her stomach before kissing the top of the bump.

"Hi baby boy." Chuck whispered, "Daddy loves you so much."

Sarah placed her hand over her over and blinked her tears away. She pulled chuck up to her before she stood on her toes and kissed him.

"You ready to go to a wedding?" Sarah asked breaking the kiss


End file.
